British holidaymakers are drunk, fat and sunburnt, according to a scathing piece published this week in the German tabloid Bild.
The cheeky piece, entitled "Bild explains the English Patients (of Majorca)", pokes fun at British men with "wandering-hands disease" and women with "underwear amnesia".
The Week
Escape your echo chamber. Get the facts behind the news, plus analysis from multiple perspectives.
Sign up for The Week's Free Newsletters
From our morning news briefing to a weekly Good News Newsletter, get the best of The Week delivered directly to your inbox.
From our morning news briefing to a weekly Good News Newsletter, get the best of The Week delivered directly to your inbox.
Brits abroad put on too much weight from drinking, it says, and develop "toasting arm", a pain akin to tennis elbow caused by lifting too many pints.
"If you burn red and white abstract art onto your body by unprotected sunbathing, you must allow us a little schadenfreude," it says.
Tattoos are branded "Anglo-Saxon rash" ("Men have 'Made in England', women have paws in green ink") and British women are accused of thinking they can have a free holiday by offering sexual favours to men.
Bild also refers to "balcony leg", in which Brits injure themselves trying to jump into the hotel pool from their balcony, and "Prince Harry syndrome", a pathological need to undress in public at every opportunity.
"Anyone who has encountered the German love of naturism may find this a touch hypocritical," says the Daily Telegraph, while The Times says the piece shows such "stunning rudeness" it is "tantamount to an act of war".
It adds: "As the anniversary of the beginning of First World War approaches, and the talk throughout Europe is of peace and reconciliation, one might have thought that traditional Anglo-German rivalries would be, temporarily, at least, laid to rest. Sadly not."
The Sun is also duly defensive, with an attempt to even the score. "Germans poke fun at Brits on hol," says its headline, "but at least we don't nick the sunbeds."
-
Political cartoons for February 1Cartoons Sunday's political cartoons include Tom Homan's offer, the Fox News filter, and more
-
Will SpaceX, OpenAI and Anthropic make 2026 the year of mega tech listings?In Depth SpaceX float may come as soon as this year, and would be the largest IPO in history
-
Reforming the House of LordsThe Explainer Keir Starmer’s government regards reform of the House of Lords as ‘long overdue and essential’
-
Israel retrieves final hostage’s body from GazaSpeed Read The 24-year-old police officer was killed during the initial Hamas attack
-
China’s Xi targets top general in growing purgeSpeed Read Zhang Youxia is being investigated over ‘grave violations’ of the law
-
Panama and Canada are negotiating over a crucial copper mineIn the Spotlight Panama is set to make a final decision on the mine this summer
-
Why Greenland’s natural resources are nearly impossible to mineThe Explainer The country’s natural landscape makes the task extremely difficult
-
Iran cuts internet as protests escalateSpeed Reada Government buildings across the country have been set on fire
-
US nabs ‘shadow’ tanker claimed by RussiaSpeed Read The ship was one of two vessels seized by the US military
-
How Bulgaria’s government fell amid mass protestsThe Explainer The country’s prime minister resigned as part of the fallout
-
Femicide: Italy’s newest crimeThe Explainer Landmark law to criminalise murder of a woman as an ‘act of hatred’ or ‘subjugation’ but critics say Italy is still deeply patriarchal
