Motherhood: why are we putting it off?
Stats show around 50% of women in England and Wales now don’t have children by 30
![Mother with baby](https://cdn.mos.cms.futurecdn.net/6iwaj5puqLnQXU3v7BnzFP-415-80.jpg)
Why are women leaving it later and later to have children, and having fewer of them? According to the Office for National Statistics, a new milestone has been reached: around half of women in England and Wales now don’t have children by the age of 30; in 1971, the figure was just 18%. At 45, nearly one in five are childless.
The news has provoked much dismay, but it didn’t surprise me, said Holly Williams in The Guardian. I’m a 36-year-old woman without children, and “my child-free friends still outnumber those with kids”. Much has changed since the 1970s. Women are educated and employed; but maternity leave is feeble and paternity leave worse.
Dating apps have given people a sense of endless romantic possibility, making it harder to settle down. Parenthood is harder, too, when jobs are uncertain and housing and childcare costs are exorbitant. Yet birth rates are also falling in parent-friendly countries such as Sweden. So perhaps something more “fundamental” is at work here. In my experience, those who really want a baby have one, despite the obstacles – but the reality is: not everyone does. And the fact that women have a choice “is a cause for celebration, not concern”.
Subscribe to The Week
Escape your echo chamber. Get the facts behind the news, plus analysis from multiple perspectives.
![https://cdn.mos.cms.futurecdn.net/flexiimages/jacafc5zvs1692883516.jpg](https://cdn.mos.cms.futurecdn.net/flexiimages/jacafc5zvs1692883516-320-80.jpg)
Sign up for The Week's Free Newsletters
From our morning news briefing to a weekly Good News Newsletter, get the best of The Week delivered directly to your inbox.
From our morning news briefing to a weekly Good News Newsletter, get the best of The Week delivered directly to your inbox.
Yes, motherhood’s a choice, unlike for previous generations, said Sarah Vine in the Daily Mail. But is it available to everyone? From 2011 to 2019, the “share of births” increased among women in higher-paid and professional roles, but fell among those on lower incomes. As the cost of living soars, “a family has become a luxury” – something policymakers worried about “a dearth of future taxpayers” must address.
It’s annoying that this is usually framed as a choice made by women, said Rachel Moss on the Huffington Post. Men must also take responsibility. Women are chided for “delaying” motherhood, but where are all these men under 30 who want to have children hiding?
It might help if motherhood wasn’t so often depicted as a miserable slog, said Rosie Kinchen in The Sunday Times. Twenty years ago, the author Rachel Cusk’s book A Life’s Work – an “unflinching” depiction of motherhood – caused an outcry. Now, maternal dissatisfaction is everywhere, from the sitcom Motherland to the Netflix film The Lost Daughter, to the Facebook group called “I regret having children” (it has 42,800 followers). The modern cult of over-involved helicopter parenting has piled on the pressure, too.
“I worry the pendulum may have swung too far,” said Judith Woods in The Daily Telegraph. It’s good that we’ve moved beyond idealising motherhood as seen in countless “online mummy blogs”. But do we really need to demonise it?
Create an account with the same email registered to your subscription to unlock access.
Sign up for Today's Best Articles in your inbox
A free daily email with the biggest news stories of the day – and the best features from TheWeek.com
-
Paloma recipe: the cocktail of the summer
The Week Recommends This refreshing drink balances the fresh and fizzy taste of grapefruit soda with a subtle flavour of smooth tequila
By Rebekah Evans, The Week UK Published
-
Mushroom edibles are tripping up users
the explainer The psychedelics can sometimes have questionable components
By Devika Rao, The Week US Published
-
Prisons are simply not prepared for extreme heat
Under the radar Inmates are at severe risk of heat-related illness
By Devika Rao, The Week US Published
-
Artworks stolen by Nazis returned to heirs of cabaret performer
It wasn't all bad Good news stories from the past seven days
By The Week Staff Published
-
Woman reunited with egg she signed in 1951
It Wasn't All Bad Good news stories from the past seven days
By The Week Staff Published
-
American rescued after 12 days in Turkish cave
It wasn't all bad Good news stories from the past seven days
By The Week Staff Published
-
Ukrainian military has ‘shown how the Russian army can be beaten’
Talking Point Recent Ukrainian frontline advances may offer hope for its counter-offensive
By The Week Staff Published
-
Earring lost at sea returned to fisherman after 23 years
feature Good news stories from the past seven days
By The Week Staff Published
-
Bully XL dogs: should they be banned?
Talking Point Goverment under pressure to prohibit breed blamed for series of fatal attacks
By The Week Staff Last updated
-
Netanyahu’s reforms: an existential threat to Israel?
feature The nation is divided over controversial move depriving Israel’s supreme court of the right to override government decisions
By The Week Staff Published
-
Farmer plants 1.2m sunflowers as present for his wife
feature Good news stories from the past seven days
By The Week Staff Published