Good week/bad week
Good week for:
Becoming a nudist, after The New York Times published “Wear Clothes? Then You’re Part of the Problem,” a column blaming the apparel industry for contributing to climate change. The piece calls on citizens to keep repairing their garments or buy second-hand clothes, and to wash everything in cold water and air-dry it.
Astronauts, with news that a spacecraft carrying cookie dough and a zero-gravity oven is on its way to the International Space Station. “Fresh-baked food could have psychological and physiological benefits for crew members,” said NASA.
Rebirth, after the director of a new film announced that a CGI version of James Dean—dead since 1955—will play a major role. “We searched high and low for the perfect character,” said director Anton Ernest, “and after months of research, we decided on James Dean.”
Bad week for:
Skeptics, after new data revealed that last month was the hottest October globally ever recorded. Temperatures were 1.24 degrees Fahrenheit warmer than the average from 1981 to 2010.
British reserve, after Prime Minister Boris Johnson kicked off his election campaign by comparing Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn to ruthless Soviet dictator Josef Stalin. The socialist Corbyn hates the wealthy, Johnson said, “with a relish and a vindictiveness not seen since Stalin persecuted the kulaks.”
Self-awareness, when Donald Trump Jr., the wealthy son, heir, and namesake of the real estate magnate and U.S. president, told Fox News that “I wish my name were Hunter Biden” so “I could go abroad and make millions off of my father’s presidency.”