Stephen Colbert and Jimmy Kimmel are comically unimpressed with the new Starbucks Unicorn Frappuccino
The marketing people at Starbucks have apparently decided that no publicity is bad publicity, judging by the product they rolled out Wednesday. "Starbucks has introduced a new drink called the Unicorn Frappuccino," Stephen Colbert said on Thursday's Late Show, "because the name Sugary Affront to God was taken." The colorful new concoction is made with pink powder, mango syrup, and a sour blue drizzle, and it changes color and flavor as you mix it around. It also seems tailor-made for mockery.
"This was Starbucks' attempt to take over social media, they say, with a drink that's made to be Instagrammed," Colbert said. "Well, I wanted to know how it actually tastes, so we went and got one." He brought it on stage. "Mmmm, oh, I wish I was dead," he said. "Tastes like I French kissed Tinkerbell." There was nothing wrong with kissing Tinkerbell, he assured everyone, though maybe that was the Frappuccino talking.
On Thursday's Jimmy Kimmel Live, Kimmel called the drink an "abomination" and "the first Frappuccino that looks like a windbreaker from the '80s." But he did more than just spitball. "It's only available through April 23, or until someone dies from drinking it, whichever comes first," he said. "And if the Unicorn Frappuccino doesn't strike your fancy — and you would think it would — Starbucks has another new item designed specifically to suit our troubled time." After watching his fake Starbucks ad, a rainbow of fruit flavors may not sound so bad. Watch below. Peter Weber
Subscribe to The Week
Escape your echo chamber. Get the facts behind the news, plus analysis from multiple perspectives.
Sign up for The Week's Free Newsletters
From our morning news briefing to a weekly Good News Newsletter, get the best of The Week delivered directly to your inbox.
From our morning news briefing to a weekly Good News Newsletter, get the best of The Week delivered directly to your inbox.
Sign up for Today's Best Articles in your inbox
A free daily email with the biggest news stories of the day – and the best features from TheWeek.com
Peter has worked as a news and culture writer and editor at The Week since the site's launch in 2008. He covers politics, world affairs, religion and cultural currents. His journalism career began as a copy editor at a financial newswire and has included editorial positions at The New York Times Magazine, Facts on File, and Oregon State University.
-
The Spanish cop, 20 million euros and 13 tonnes of cocaine
In the Spotlight Óscar Sánchez Gil, Chief Inspector of Spain's Economic and Tax Crimes Unit, has been arrested for drug trafficking
By The Week UK Published
-
5 hilarious cartoons about the rise and fall of Matt Gaetz
Cartoons Artists take on age brackets, backbiting, and more
By The Week US Published
-
The future of X
Talking Point Trump's ascendancy is reviving the platform's coffers, whether or not a merger is on the cards
By The Week UK Published
-
US charges Indian tycoon with bribery, fraud
Speed Read Indian billionaire Gautam Adani has been indicted by US prosecutors for his role in a $265 million scheme to secure solar energy deals
By Peter Weber, The Week US Published
-
Boeing machinists approve contract, end strike
Speed Read The company's largest union approved the new contract offer, ending a seven-week strike
By Peter Weber, The Week US Published
-
US economy still strong in final preelection report
Speed Read It grew at a solid 2.8% annual rate from July through September
By Peter Weber, The Week US Published
-
Boeing machinists reject deal, continue strike
Speed Read The rejection came the same day Boeing reported a $6.2 billion quarterly loss
By Peter Weber, The Week US Published
-
Ports reopen after dockworkers halt strike
Speed Read The 36 ports that closed this week, from Maine to Texas, will start reopening today
By Peter Weber, The Week US Published
-
Empty-nest boomers aren't selling their big homes
Speed Read Most Americans 60 and older do not intend to move, according to a recent survey
By Peter Weber, The Week US Published
-
Brazil accuses Musk of 'disinformation campaign'
Speed Read A Brazilian Supreme Court judge has opened an inquiry into Elon Musk and X
By Rafi Schwartz, The Week US Published
-
Disney board fends off Peltz infiltration bid
Speed Read Disney CEO Bob Iger has defeated activist investor Nelson Peltz in a contentious proxy battle
By Rafi Schwartz, The Week US Published