Speed Reads

The Daily Showdown

Trevor Noah warns that John Bolton is a notorious chicken hawk. Jordan Klepper explains why that's a positive.

President Trump is replacing National Security Adviser H.R. McMaster with "Geppetto cosplayer John Bolton," Trevor Noah said on Tuesday's Daily Show. If Bolton looks familiar, "it may be because he's been on the Cap'n Crunch box for over 40 years," he joked, "or it may be because, like most people Trump hires these days, you probably saw him on the TV."

But Bolton is more than just a "Fox News pundit," Noah explained. He has served in three Republican administrations, most recently as George W. Bush's ambassador to the U.N., "but don't be thrown off by his title as diplomat, because while Bolton may look like a harmless model train enthusiast, he's developed a notorious rep as a guy who really wants to bomb everyone" (as well as an abusive, stapler-throwing coworker). "Here's the best example of how war-horny John Bolton is: He's still defending the one war that everyone else agrees was a terrible idea," Noah said. Sure, invading Iraq "destabilized the Middle East and brought us ISIS, but other than that, nailed it."

"Here's how you know this is a great idea: the talking heads on the left think it's a terrible idea," Jordan Klepper responded at The Opposition. Don't listen. Bolton is "the president's most influential adviser on matters of war — and when it comes to war, John Bolton, as the kids say, is DTF: Down To Facilitate regime change," Klepper said. "He's the right man for the job." Kobi Libii explained how Bolton's decision to avoid going to Vietnam, a war he supported, makes him the perfect "hawk" to advise Trump. "We all know hawks think wars solve everything, but we rarely ask why," Libii said. "It's because hawks fly safely above the battle. From that lofty vantage, all Bolton feels is the wind in his mustache and all he hears is 'boom boom,' 'ka-pow,' 'ratatatatat,' 'awesome!'" Watch below. Peter Weber