Last Night on Late Night
"Earlier today, President Biden welcomed a special guest to the White House: former President Barack Obama," Stephen Colbert said on Tuesday's Late Show. "Then hopefully they locked the doors to keep him in. 'You can come out after the midterms.'" Obama "was there to promote ObamaCare, and to get that pack of smokes he forgot in the Lincoln Bedroom," he joked, adding that he's not buying Obama's explanation that calling Biden "vice president" was actually a gag. "I think he went up there and the first thing he said was a gaffe. He and Biden have more in common than we thought."
Judge Ketanji Brown Jackson will likely win confirmation to the Supreme Court this week, and "while some Republicans have broken ranks to support soon-to-be-Justice Jackson, they are fully united against what they say is the real threat to America: cartoon rodents making your children gay," Colbert said. "Disney spoke out against Florida's stupid and hateful 'Don't Say Gay' bill," so "Florida Republicans have put Disney in their sights like it was Bambi's mom." The "Florida war on Disney" has reached all the way to Congress, with Rep. Matt Gaetz (R-Fla.) tweeting a list of "things that scare Disney," he added. "Another thing that scares Disney? Matt Gaetz within 50 yards of the teacup ride."
The Late Show also imagined Obama's return to the White House as a buddy movie sequel, where things are so similar to 2014, Sarah Palin is still "a thing."
"Nowadays, Sarah Palin, she seems downright quaint compared to the monsters that are in the House, like Marjorie Taylor Greene," Jimmy Kimmel said on Kimmel Live. Greene "is especially upset with the three Republican senators who said they'll vote yes on Judge Ketanji Brown Jackson," calling them "pro-pedophile" for backing her confirmation, he added. "I mean, besides that being disgusting, the woman is good pals with Matt Gaetz, who is currently under investigation for trafficking minors for sex."
Obama's triumphant White House return has "really gotta bother Trump," Kimmel said. "All these lies and schemes and lawsuits to get back to the White House, Obama just strolls right in there."
Everyone at the White House was so excited to see Obama, "after a few minutes, Biden was like, 'All right, that's more than enough,'" Jimmy Fallon said on The Tonight Show. Meanwhile, "the CDC has announced plans to revamp the agency," he said. "Step one to the revamp: Get Obama to come visit."