Stephen Colbert explains to Trump why he can't criticize Matt Lauer for sexual misconduct

Stephen Colbert returned to the air Wednesday after a weeklong break, and he'd noticed the changing media landscape. "I am one of the few men still allowed on television," he joked on The Late Show, pointing to NBC's firing of morning anchor Matt Lauer. "According to the chairman of NBC News, Lauer was fired due to 'inappropriate sexual behavior in the workplace,'" he said, "not to be confused with appropriate sexual behavior in the workplace, because that does not exist." Colbert went through some of the salacious details of Lauer's alleged misconduct, including a tidbit from a colleague involving a sex toy and a note. "It's bad enough he gave her a sex toy, but he also gave her instructions?" he asked. "He found a way to mansplain sexual harassment."

President Trump, of course, weighed in on Twitter, saying the heads of NBC should be fired, too, "for putting out so much Fake News." Colbert couldn't take it. "Listen up, you don't get to comment," he said. "That is the pot calling the kettle at 3 a.m. and asking what she's wearing. Plus, remember the whole Billy Bush/bus thing?"

In fact, Trump is casting doubt now that it really is him bragging about grabbing women's genitalia on the Access Hollywood bus, so Colbert played the tape. "You know, when you listen to it again, it can't be him, because anybody who said that wouldn't get elected president of the United States," he said. The fact that Trump admitted he said it and apologized only made Colbert more suspicious.

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Colbert also hit some happier news, the engagement of Britain's Prince Harry to American actress Meghan Markel. But he found a Trump angle there, too: "England, a word of warning. We had a cool, biracial leader for a while, too. And I can tell you, you need to savor it. Because the next princess is gonna suck." Watch below. Peter Weber