The very best in Conservative and Labour political merchandise

Nothing shows support for a political party more than a set of cushions, tea towels, mugs or coasters

Thatcher Mug
(Image credit: The Conservative Party)

As well as stocking up on window stickers and campaign literature, people with a passion for politics can express their enthusiasm for their chosen party with all kinds of official branded merchandise.

Several parties have an official shop that sells everything from cushions to pint glasses, but it's the two major parties that have the largest array of party-approved goods on sale.

So how do the Conservative and Labour merchandise lines compare? Here are some of the best (and weirdest) things you can buy from their official websites.

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'So this is the new moderate militant-free Labour Party' tea towel

Perfect for: Tory party members still holding on to extremely specific 1980s grudges and anyone who's ever dreamed of drying a plate on Jeremy Corbyn's face.

"It's a housewife's budget!" tote bag

Perfect for: People who refuse to use the word 'chairperson' and ironic millennial feminists.

"Secondary picketing... is a right that should be enjoyed" key ring

Perfect for: Tories worried that Neil Kinnock is on the cusp of a resurgence and anyone with incredible eyesight.

'A United Empire!' coaster

Perfect for: Victorian music hall performers and people who start sentences with "I'm not saying the Empire was all good, but…"

'Don't just hope for a better life vote for one' mug

Perfect for: People who speak reverentially of "Mrs Thatcher" and owners of retro cafes in east London.

'Look out there, or you'll have the whole blooming show down' cushion

Perfect for: Anyone whose visitors enjoy having the nuances of early 20th century satirical cartoons explained to them.

Economy leaflet

Perfect for: People who think the economy is in dire straits but have £15 to spend on a piece of paper.

Liberty Pin Badge

Perfect for: Those who like their Socialism sinister.

Jeremy Corbyn pint glass

Perfect for: Metropolitan elites looking to connect with the common man and ale-loving socialists reclaiming their hobby from Nigel Farage.

Labour Party wristband

Perfect for: Year 7s in 2003

Nye Bevan poster

Perfect for: Those who think "colourful" posters and "catchy" slogans are signs of a disordered mind.

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