Good week, Bad week

Good week for:

Escaping, after a Swedish inmate suffering from a toothache broke out of prison to visit a dentist. “My entire face was completely swollen,” he explained. “I just couldn’t stand it.” The escapee turned himself in, and had one day added to his sentence.

Animal intelligence, after zoologists observed crocodiles and alligators balancing twigs on their snouts to lure and chomp on birds seeking nest-building material—the first time tool use has ever been seen in reptiles.

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Earplugs, after rowdy Seattle Seahawks fans screamed and jumped up and down so hard during their team’s 34–7 home win over New Orleans that their celebrations produced a record 137.6 decibels and an earthquake measured between magnitude 1 and 2.

Bad week for:

Cat owners, after Japanese scientists found that felines have evolved to ignore their owners’ voices. “Cats, unlike dogs, have not been domesticated to obey humans’ orders,” said researchers. “Rather, they seem to take the initiative in human-cat interaction.”

Con artists, after a man who sued Washington, D.C.’s subway system, claiming he’d slipped on a banana peel in an elevator, was charged with fraud when video footage showed him tossing the peel on the ground, stepping on it, and theatrically falling down.

The superstitious, after a river flowing through the Slovakian town of Myjava suddenly turned the color of blood. “It looks like someone slaughtered 1,000 virgins,” said one frightened local. Police suspected that a slaughterhouse upriver had sprung a leak.