Good week for:
Midnight snackers, after a British inventor used fluorescent proteins from jellyfish to create an ice cream that glows in the dark. Charlie Francis said he thought his invention was safe, since “I tried some and I don’t seem to be glowing anywhere.”
Imaginative defenses, after a Canadian man tried to evade punishment under Dubai’s strict anti-profanity laws by claiming that in Canada, the phrase “f--- off” is a colorful way of telling another person “to walk away.”
Evading Big Brother, after China’s government admitted that its ubiquitous security cameras cannot see through the dense pollution shrouding the nation’s cities. “On the smoggiest days, we may need to use radar,” said one scientist.
Bad week for:
Sex education, after an Oregon middle school football coach outraged parents by holding a team party at a Hooters restaurant, which features busty waitresses. “I believe this is a fine venue,” Randy Burbach said. “If you have a dirty mind, you’ll find dirt.”
Gang signs, after the Hells Angels motorcycle club sued Dillard’s department store for selling hats and shirts emblazoned with a logo similar to the bikers’ winged Death Head. “Guys live and die for that patch,” said Hells Angels attorney Fritz Clapp.
Saudi Arabia’s space program, after cleric Sheik Ali al Hemki issued a fatwa against volunteering for the Mars One manned expedition, saying that taking a one-way ride to Mars would be suicidal and did not conform to “responsible Muslim” practices.
