Good week, Bad week

Good week for:

Italian wives, with the news that due to Europe’s economic crisis, many Italian husbands can no longer afford mistresses. “It really messed up my romantic life,” said a 48-year-old lawyer from Rome who had to give up his second apartment, and thus his mistress.

Destroying your kid’s iPod, after Israeli researchers discovered that 98 percent of teenagers make serious driving errors while blasting music from their own playlists. Teens drove best while listening to calming soft rock and light jazz, the study found.

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Turnabout, after a Vancouver woman saw the bicycle that was stolen from her put up for sale on Craigslist. She called, met the seller, and asked for a test ride. “And then I just got on it and rode away,” said Kayla Smith.

Bad week for:

Making the grade, after all 25,000 students who took an entrance exam for the University of Liberia failed the test. A university official said all the students “lacked enthusiasm.”

Taking your personal belongings, after a survey of 700 flight attendants revealed that among the items air passengers have left on planes are a live parrot, a box of dried fish, a toupee, handcuffs, and a glass eye.

Online education, after police arrested a New Hampshire man who posted 35 videos on YouTube explaining how to grow marijuana at home. Kyle Berry didn’t appear in the videos, but authorities said his reflection could be seen in one of the tutorials. “He’s not the brightest person in the world,” said a sheriff.