Last week's question: The fabulously wealthy city of Dubai is attempting to induce its increasingly chubby citizens to lose weight by offering them a gram of gold for every kilogram — roughly 2.2 pounds — they shed. What inducement should the U.S. government offer Americans to drop some pounds?
THE WINNER: For every collective ton lost, Congress will lose one member
Lena Rotenberg, Keedysville, MD
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SECOND PLACE: For every pound lost, the NSA will erase one week of your recordings
Catherine Butler, El Dorado, AZ
THIRD PLACE: Stretch pants, because the weight will be back by winter
K.C. Boren, Victoria, TX
HONORABLE MENTIONS:
A couple of free Double Quarter Pounders for every pound you lose
Sonja Amadae, Columbus, OH
Emigration to Dubai, if they should ever regain the weight
Ujjal Kohli, Saratoga, CA
A $10 income tax credit for every pound lost
Ellen Hoover, Danville, PA
A skinless, baked chicken in every pot
Ken Kellam III, Dallas, TX
Abolish one "czar" for each collective 1,000 pounds lost
Dave Lawliss, West Chazy, NY
A copy of Paula Deen's cookbook
Philip Barnett, Bronx, NY
Pundit-free TV for life
Janine Witte, New Hope, PA
Health-care premiums directly proportional to body fat content
Mark Weaver, Redondo Beach, CA
An ounce of medical marijuana for every 20 pounds lost
Paul Carroll, Garland, TX
Buttcoins
Pierre R. Hart, Etowah, NC
For each pound lost, Uncle Sam will shed 1 inch of red tape
Dwayne Hatfield, Bridgewater, ME
A trip to Dubai
Barbara Dykema, Cool, CA
A job
Anne Thiessen, Catonsville, MD
One less political TV advertisement per pound lost
Brett Howard, Washington, DC
Pounds for Rounds: 1 box of ammunition per pound lost
Adam Freeman, Colorado Springs, CO
Interest-free college loans
Jane Lundy, Whitehouse Station, NJ
Free photos of my weight loss progress from the drones hovering over my house
Kristen Kansiewicz, Lynn, MA
Anyone losing 25 pounds may use the carpool lane when driving alone
Kenneth R. Updegrove, Cedaredge, CO
One ounce of truth for every pound lost
Richard Kimball, Franklin, NC
For every pound, local representative or senator must return $100 to a PAC
Jagdish Dalal, Avon, CT
Free Big Gulp for every 7.11 pounds lost
Darren Pollock, Pasadena, CA
Reinstate one usurped civil liberty for each 10 pounds of weight shed
Kenneth Ross, Flanders, NJ
For every pound Americans lose, one less Justin Bieber song played by radio stations
Shane Fischer, Winter Park, FL
Exemption from snooping in your health records
Satya Sridhar, Glen Ellyn, IL
A date with Subway's Jared
John O'Connor, Crozet, VA
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