The Week contest: Worth your weight in gold

Dubai is offering gold as a reward for weight loss... how should Americans get their just desserts?

Weight
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Last week's question: The fabulously wealthy city of Dubai is attempting to induce its increasingly chubby citizens to lose weight by offering them a gram of gold for every kilogram — roughly 2.2 pounds — they shed. What inducement should the U.S. government offer Americans to drop some pounds?

THE WINNER: For every collective ton lost, Congress will lose one member

Lena Rotenberg, Keedysville, MD

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SECOND PLACE: For every pound lost, the NSA will erase one week of your recordings

Catherine Butler, El Dorado, AZ

THIRD PLACE: Stretch pants, because the weight will be back by winter

K.C. Boren, Victoria, TX

HONORABLE MENTIONS:

A couple of free Double Quarter Pounders for every pound you lose

Sonja Amadae, Columbus, OH

Emigration to Dubai, if they should ever regain the weight

Ujjal Kohli, Saratoga, CA

A $10 income tax credit for every pound lost

Ellen Hoover, Danville, PA

A skinless, baked chicken in every pot

Ken Kellam III, Dallas, TX

Abolish one "czar" for each collective 1,000 pounds lost

Dave Lawliss, West Chazy, NY

A copy of Paula Deen's cookbook

Philip Barnett, Bronx, NY

Pundit-free TV for life

Janine Witte, New Hope, PA

Health-care premiums directly proportional to body fat content

Mark Weaver, Redondo Beach, CA

An ounce of medical marijuana for every 20 pounds lost

Paul Carroll, Garland, TX

Buttcoins

Pierre R. Hart, Etowah, NC

For each pound lost, Uncle Sam will shed 1 inch of red tape

Dwayne Hatfield, Bridgewater, ME

A trip to Dubai

Barbara Dykema, Cool, CA

A job

Anne Thiessen, Catonsville, MD

One less political TV advertisement per pound lost

Brett Howard, Washington, DC

Pounds for Rounds: 1 box of ammunition per pound lost

Adam Freeman, Colorado Springs, CO

Interest-free college loans

Jane Lundy, Whitehouse Station, NJ

Free photos of my weight loss progress from the drones hovering over my house

Kristen Kansiewicz, Lynn, MA

Anyone losing 25 pounds may use the carpool lane when driving alone

Kenneth R. Updegrove, Cedaredge, CO

One ounce of truth for every pound lost

Richard Kimball, Franklin, NC

For every pound, local representative or senator must return $100 to a PAC

Jagdish Dalal, Avon, CT

Free Big Gulp for every 7.11 pounds lost

Darren Pollock, Pasadena, CA

Reinstate one usurped civil liberty for each 10 pounds of weight shed

Kenneth Ross, Flanders, NJ

For every pound Americans lose, one less Justin Bieber song played by radio stations

Shane Fischer, Winter Park, FL

Exemption from snooping in your health records

Satya Sridhar, Glen Ellyn, IL

A date with Subway's Jared

John O'Connor, Crozet, VA

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