Feature

Good week, Bad week

Divine commentary, Really needing a drink, and more

Good week for:

Nervous fliers, after aviation researchers declared the airline industry safer now than ever before, with the risk of passengers dying within the U.S. dropping to 1 in 45 million flights. 

The pythons, after a month-long effort to rid the Florida Everglades of Burmese pythons by 1,500 gun- and machete-wielding hunters ended with the capture of just 50 of the estimated 100,000 well-camouflaged, wily snakes in the swamp. “I saw nothing but alligators and birds,” said one frustrated hunter. 

Divine commentary, after the dome of St. Peter’s Basilica in the Vatican was struck by lightning twice in the hours following Pope Benedict XVI’s resignation announcement. 

Bad week for:

Really needing a drink, after Sen. Marco Rubio, in the midst of making the Republican rebuttal to the State of the Union address, leaned partway out of the TV frame to grab a bottle of water and take a swig. Twitter wags called it “#Watergate.”

The gullible, after hackers broadcast a warning through a Montana TV station’s emergency alert system that “the dead are rising from their graves and attacking the living.” Four concerned viewers called the police to see if the zombie apocalypse was real. 

Red meat, after the most loyal customer of Las Vegas’s Heart Attack Grill—home of the “Quadruple Bypass Burger”—died from a heart attack at 52. Owner Jon Basso mourned the loss of daily burger eater John Alleman, but said it “isn’t going to stop us from what we’re doing. People have got to live their lives.”

Recommended

Protesters in India demand official investigation into Adani Group
Protests against Gautam Adani and Prime Minister Narendra Modi in India.
Anger in India

Protesters in India demand official investigation into Adani Group

Health care workers stage massive walkout in U.K. over low wages
Healthcare workers protest in the United Kingdom.
They've Had Enough

Health care workers stage massive walkout in U.K. over low wages

Putin promised not to kill Zelensky, says former Israeli prime minister
Former Israeli Prime Minister Naftali Bennett
he gave his word

Putin promised not to kill Zelensky, says former Israeli prime minister

Hundreds killed in powerful 7.8 magnitude earthquake in Turkey, Syria
Collapsed building in Adana, Turkey
Nature's Terrors

Hundreds killed in powerful 7.8 magnitude earthquake in Turkey, Syria

Most Popular

United States shoots down Chinese spy balloon over Atlantic Ocean
A suspected Chinese spy balloon over Montana.
99 Red Balloons?

United States shoots down Chinese spy balloon over Atlantic Ocean

New report describes numerous security breaches at the Supreme Court
Supreme Court building.
Problems with Justice

New report describes numerous security breaches at the Supreme Court

Yale honors Black girl who had the police called on her for spraying lanternflies
Spotted lanterflies
black girl magic

Yale honors Black girl who had the police called on her for spraying lanternflies