Drunk Oregonian falls asleep in a dumpster
An Oregon man decided to sleep off a night of heavy drinking by crawling into a dumpster—and was still sleeping when the dumpster’s contents were emptied into a garbage truck. Justin Gilpatrick, 27, somehow survived even though the truck twice tried to compact the load of trash inside. The truck driver finally heard Gilpatrick’s screaming, turned off the compactor, and set him free. “I have not had a drink in years and the one time I do this is what happens,” Gilpatrick said. “I will never drink again.”
Demi Moore's new friend
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Demi Moore is pretending to have a new boyfriend to make it appear that she’s gotten over Ashton Kutcher, says the National Enquirer. The 49-year-old actress has recently been appearing publicly with a handsome 37-year-old New Zealand actor, Martin Henderson. But a source says “the whole thing is a setup on Demi’s part. They’re friends and that’s it. Martin kind of felt sorry for Demi.” Moore, the source says, “freaked out” when she found out that Kutcher had become seriously involved with actress Mila Kunis, 29.
A Norwegian bear bash
A family of Norwegian bears broke into a holiday cabin and threw an epic, alcohol-fueled party. The cabin’s owner, Even Nilsen, returned to the cabin to find that the bears had eaten all the food and bitten into more than a hundred cans of beer, sucking down the contents. One bear evidently became so intoxicated that it passed out on a bed, leaving it covered in beer and fur. “It’s almost like it’s taken out of Goldilocks and the three bears,” said Nilsen. “They had a hell of a party in there.’’