Good week, Bad week

Good week for...

Very persistent birthers, after Sheriff Joe Arpaio of Maricopa County, Ariz., announced that his investigators had concluded that PresidentObama’s birth certificate was a forgery. “I’m just doing my job,” said Arpaio. He’s currently being investigated by a federal grand jury for abuse of power.

Romance, after Californians Allan Marks, 98, and Lillian Hartley, 95, became the world’s oldest newlyweds when they were married on leap day. “I didn’t want a relationship—I enjoyed my freedom—but he got me,” said Lillian.

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Public servants, after a survey of 43,000 employees found that government workers are the happiest. The least happy employees work in agriculture, mining, Internet firms, and the media.

Bad week for...

Assuming no one’s watching, after a 50-year-old Frenchman took Google to court for posting on its Street View service a picture of him urinating in his yard. The man says that even though his face was blurred out, he’s become the laughingstock of his small village.

Confidence in the euro zone, after video footage surfaced that shows German Finance Minister Wolfgang Schäuble secretly doing a sudoku puzzle on his iPad during a debate over the 130-billion-euro bailout of Greece.

Representing your city, after Jean-Sun Hannah Ahn, recently crowned Miss Seattle, had to apologize for complaining about the city in tweets she made three months ago. “Ugh,” she tweeted, “can’t stand cold rainy Seattle and the annoying people.”