Women often celebrate the impending arrival of an infant with baby showers, complete with heaps of gifted onesies, silly games, and maybe just a splash of Pinot Grigio. Now, a growing number of men are having their own pre-baby celebrations. These "dadchelor," or "dadelor," parties are akin to bachelor parties for expectant fathers — essentially "a booze-soaked last hurrah with their buddies before they become totally lame." Here, a brief guide to the trend:
What do they do at these "dadchelor" parties?
Also known as a "daddymoon" or "man-shower," a dadchelor bash might include a "diaper keg," wherein men bring dad-to-be diapers that they can exchange for beer; an extravagant trip; and, almost certainly, plenty of drinking. "Let's have one more night where responsible decisions don't matter," says David Hellman, a Chicago man who is planning such a celebration for this summer.
How wild do they get?
One dadelor party attendee, Brian Podivia, says the fun is typically fairly innocent, though often in raucous spring break locales. None of his friends has ever been arrested while celebrating impending dadhood, though at one Pittsburgh bash, an attendee did go missing for several hours. "He called me at about 3 a.m. and said, 'Hey, I'm in Ohio, can someone get me?'"
Why are men doing this?
Carley Roney, an editor at the TheBump.com, a site for pregnant women and new mothers, says she suspects the trend is on the rise because of the increased child-rearing role that modern men are taking. "In the (19)50s it all fell on the girls," she says. "Now, it's a shared responsibility. Guys are just as overwhelmed by the thought of how much their lives are going to change. This is the antidote to that, the hedge against it."
What do women think of these soirees?
They're on the fence. Maybe I'm just envious, says Sierra at Babble, but women's baby showers pretty much involve baby gifts and "sorting laundry with your mom." I'd much rather have cigars and lots of booze with my friends. It's a "little annoying" that men need "a special party to ease them into a time when their wives won't be paying exclusive attention to them," says Anna North at Jezebel. "But it's nice that, increasingly, men seem to be taking their responsibilities as fathers seriously, and acknowledging that when the baby comes, it's not just the mother's life that's going to change."