Good Week, Bad Week
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Good week for:
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People with too much disposable income, after a trendy Brooklyn, N.Y., coffee shop began serving a $12 cup of Ethiopian joe. The coffee, boasts the shop, has “tropical fruit notes of pineapple, kiwi, and key lime,” along with “floral notes of jasmine, lemongrass, and rosemary.”
Superheroes, after an Australian comic book store owner wearing a Spider-Man costume stopped a thief attempting to shoplift a rare comic worth $150, as two customers dressed as Jedi Knights blocked the front door with their light sabers drawn.
Breast men, after a British department store said it has sold out of bras with a 20-inch-wide KK cup. “Many large sizes we sell regularly were unheard of a decade ago,” said a spokeswoman.
Bad week for:
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Breast men, after Virginia Attorney General Ken Cuccinelli distributed lapel pins to his staff with an altered version of the state seal, with the exposed right breast of Roman goddess Virtus modestly covered in armor.
Sushi lovers, after the People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals accused two New York Asian restaurants of serving live, writhing octopus tentacles in a dish with garlic and jalapeño peppers. The restaurants contend that the tentacles are dead and continue to writhe only because of automatic nerve activity.
Accountability, after Texas Gov. Rick Perry said the massive oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico should not be blamed on the oil industry, calling such spills “acts of God that cannot be prevented.”
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