The daily gossip: Jessica Simpson reveals affair with mysterious 'massive movie star,' Taylor Lautner shares regrets about Kanye West VMAs incident, and more

Paging Benoit Blanc: we have your next case. Jessica Simpson has published a short story revealing she had a secret romance with an unnamed "massive movie star," who was in a relationship. As Simpson describes it, she met this person, "who I grew up thinking was so hot," at the 2001 VMAs, where he "was undressing me with his eyes." She and the movie star kissed for the first time years later after her divorce. But she recalls being shocked to learn he had a girlfriend, whom he was photographed with on a red carpet. Though he claimed that relationship was over, Simpson says she soon "felt like a call girl," and it became clear he was trying to "hide me from his chick," so she broke things off. She never names the celebrity, but it's someone famous enough to be making "millions and millions per film." We haven't seen a Simpson mystery this intriguing since "Who Shot Mr. Burns?" 

Taylor has made some rare comments about his ex-girlfriend, Taylor, in a conversation with his wife … Taylor. Taylor Lautner chatted with his wife (whose name is also Taylor Lautner, though she goes by Tay) on their podcast and named the moment from his life he wishes he could redo: The infamous 2009 VMAs, where Kanye West interrupted Taylor Swift's speech. Lautner, who was dating Swift at the time, presented the award and stood behind her as she accepted. But when Ye got on stage, Lautner recalled assuming this was a "practiced and rehearsed skit," which is why he could be seen laughing in the background. "The second she turned back around and I saw her face for the first time, I was like, 'Oh. No. That wasn't good. Probably should have said something,'" Lautner recalled, and Lautner — that is, Tay Lautner — declared, "I'm deceased." This may not be enough Taylors for one story, though, so would Taylor Kitsch care to weigh in? 

Who's angrier at Netflix these days, password sharers or Squid Game contestants? It's a close call. Netflix's real Squid Game competition show based on the hit South Korean series was recently accused of having contestants compete in freezing temperatures for hours to the point that some needed medical attention. Now, former players have confirmed to Rolling Stone reports of "inhumane" freezing conditions during filming, and at least 10 people reportedly collapsed. On top of that, Rolling Stone reports contestants allege the game itself was "rigged," as some people "appeared to be pre-selected to advance to the next round," including TikTok and Instagram influencers, while some allegedly crossed the finish line but were still eliminated. "We were a human horse race," a former contestant told the outlet, "and they were treating us like horses out in the cold racing and [the race] was fixed." See, this is why Netflix should have done a background check on the guy they hired to produce the show: Jigsaw. 

Gruntilda: not even once. On Jimmy Kimmel Live!, Nick Offerman revealed he hasn't played The Last of Us despite starring in the HBO adaptation because he quit video games 25 years ago. The reason? Banjo-Kazooie. "I'm very indulgent," Offerman explained. "I lost a couple of weeks to a video game called Banjo-Kazooie." He recalled two full weeks when he was hopelessly addicted to the "slow dopamine drip" of the Nintendo 64 platformer. "Then it's over, and you're like, 'Yes, I won!'" Offerman said. "And immediately I'm like, 'what have I done with my life?'" So Offerman decided to quit gaming cold turkey. "Games have gotten so good, like The Last of Us, that I think I'd be in a basement and I wouldn't even be going to auditions for shows like this," he added. But hey, now we know who to cast as Mumbo Jumbo in our gritty Banjo-Kazooie Showtime series. 

Is it finally time to let go of this age-old Titanic debate? In a new National Geographic special, James Cameron goes to absurd lengths to "find out once and for all" whether Jack could have survived at the end of his 1997 film by getting on the raft with Rose. Cameron collaborates with a team of scientists and two stunt people to recreate the end of the film and go through various scenarios for how it could have played out. In one, Jack and Rose share the raft, but they're submerged in the freezing water, so he wouldn't survive. But Cameron eventually finds a scenario where Jack is able to get on the raft and potentially survive if Rose gives him her life jacket. So yes, Cameron admits, "Jack might have lived," though "there's a lot of variables." Now that that's settled, time for Cameron to hire a team of researchers to determine whether Avatar has, in fact, had cultural impact.