Princess Charlotte to start nursery school in January

By The Week Staff

last updated 18 December 2017

Princess Charlotte's future (according to astrologers)

12 May

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In a 9,000-word analysis, Astrotheme says Charlotte will have a taste for "short trips", but will not be content with "noisy and flashy" things. With Neptune as one of her three dominant planets, the Princess may even have an "extreme sensibility" that turns her into a psychic or a clairvoyant, says the site. It also predicts that she will be so romantic and dreamy, that she is "in love practically all the time".

Dozens of red-haired royal fans are convinced that Princess Charlotte is ginger and that is why her head was wrapped in a bonnet during her first public appearance. Numerous people made the claim on Twitter, confident that the new royal baby takes after her uncle Harry. "They covered her head. She's ginger," announced one. "Is Princess Charlotte the newest ginger on the block?" asked another. "Welcome to the ranks if that little tuft of hair is anything to go by! Our kind rock!"

Several mediums incorrectly predicted the new baby's name and date of birth, but this hasn't stopped other psychics confidently forecasting Princess Charlotte's future. Psychic Sally Morgan, who once worked with Princess Diana, says the new princess will be vocal and tenacious and will "ruffle feathers" when she is older. She will also fly helicopters and planes, love sailing boats, water, surfing and jet skiing – and may suffer from allergies. "She will have a very long life, and be very, very healthy, but she will have allergies, and will suffer from really bad hay fever," Morgan told Now magazine. "So you'll often see her with hankies, sneezing into a hanky or have a hanky close to hand."

Pro-Kremlin newspaper Komsomolskaya Pravda carried claims that it was "impossible" for Kate Middleton to look so good just after she had given birth. Therefore, she must have given birth a few days before she emerged from the Lindo Wing with Princess Charlotte. Several women speaking to the newspaper said the new royal baby looked "too big" for a newborn and that her face was too "smooth and pale". Some said the baby must be three days old, others said she must have been born up to ten days ago.

Other women quoted by Komsomolskaya Pravda were convinced that Kate had not given birth at all. "It was a surrogate mother who gave birth but not her," said one. "Kate must have been wearing a fake belly showing to the people that she was pregnant. It is just not real to walk yourself several hours after birth and wave to the public in white dress." The sceptics claimed all new mothers want to sleep for several hours. "This is a fairy tale of a family of show offs," they said.

Possibly the strangest story to appear on the front page of a magazine was that Kate Middleton visited the US while she was pregnant in December to meet up with Princess Diana's secret daughter. The Globe claims the woman, Sarah, is now 33 and lives in New England. Stranger still, the magazine says Sarah was conceived after a rogue doctor stole one of Princess Diana's eggs (while testing her fertility before she married Prince Charles) and used it to impregnate his wife.

David Cameron will be pleased to know that if he is still Prime Minister at the next election he is likely to have the royal baby's seal of approval, after it was revealed that girls who are named Charlotte tend to vote for the Conservative party. Analysts at You Gov discovered that the princess is likely to be a Tory supporter after compiling a list of 130 of the most common British names and their voting habits. Observers were also quick to point out that the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge were wearing blue and yellow when they first presented the princess to the world after leaving the hospital. "The coalition colour scheme was purely coincidental, but this?" the Spectator says. "Perhaps a bit more subtle than simply naming her Princess Tori…"