Relax, Archie isn't actually getting killed off

By now, you've almost certainly heard the terrible news: Archie, the redheaded, romantically indecisive hero of the long-running Archie comics series, will be killed off in an upcoming issue. "RIP, Archie," mourns USA Today. "Riverdale just won't be the same," laments The New York Times.

But don't start writing your Archie eulogy just yet. The CNN interview that originally revealed Archie's impending death clarifies that the story merely marks the end of the relatively short-lived Life with Archie series, which has offered a variety of Archie adventures set in two future parallel universes: One in which he's married to Betty, and one in which he's married to Veronica.

Though Archie Comics CEO Jon Goldwater promises not to "retcon" Archie's death — thereby saving him from the kind of yo-yoing that has greeted the deaths of comics characters like Superman, Batman, and Captain America — it's not exactly the end of Archie; both the main Archie series and the zombie-themed Afterlife with Archie will continue on as normal.

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The bottom line: If you're a huge Life with Archie fan, go ahead and mourn. If you're not, move along — there's nothing to see here.