Speed Reads


A local Florida news station just interviewed the Grim Reaper

A local news station in Florida had a rather surprising guest on Friday afternoon: Death himself. During a story on the reopening of the state's beaches, ABC News' Panama City affiliate spoke with the Grim Reaper, who was busy protesting the loosening of coronavirus restrictions before the danger of COVID-19 had fully passed.

"I'm here today to try to make the point that it's premature that we open our beaches," the scythe-bearing harvester of souls explained. "I'm a huge proponent of public beaches, and I've been fighting for that for year, but I think the danger of bringing all the people here to our area and spreading the virus — I think it's going to prolong the recovery we have."

Florida is one of several states that have begun to loosen restrictions despite having recorded its highest single-day death toll this week. Watch the interview (which of course isn't actually with the Pale Rider himself, but with a Walton County attorney named Daniel W. Uhlfelder dressed as such) below. Jeva Lange