Parents tend to favour their youngest child, survey finds

A new survey by Mumsnet and Gransnet found that 23% of Mumsnet users with more than one child admitted that they have a favourite, along with 42% of Gransnet users with more than one grandchild.

Mumsnet surveyed 1,185 of its users, while Gransnet carried out a survey of 1,111 of its users.

The survey found that parents tend to favour the youngest of their children, while more grandparents prefer their first grandchild. More than half (56%) of parents with a favourite say it’s their youngest child (26% say it’s their oldest). Of grandparents who admit to having a favourite, 39% say it’s the eldest.

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A total of 61% said their favourite child is “easy” compared with their siblings. Conversely, less than half (41%) of grandparents said their favourite is ‘the easy one’. Nearly three-quarters (74%) of parents and 67% of grandparents with a favourite say the child is “unstintingly loving and affectionate”, according to the report.

Mumsnet and Gransnet founder Justine Roberts said: “Favouritism is one of the last taboos and can provoke a lot of guilt, so it’s important to say that feeling a greater affinity for a particular child – often, whichever one is willing to put their shoes on – is fairly common, and doesn’t have to be disastrous.

“Toxic favouritism, where siblings become aware of being treated unfairly over the long term, is a whole other ball game. The distilled Mumsnet wisdom on this issue is that lots of parents like their children differently: the crucial thing is to love them all wholly.”