The QT: J.K. Rowling's mistaken spell, a massive bull semen heist, and more
A veteran journalist, tongue firmly in cheek, riffs on the latest headlines

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QT Trickle-On Economics Update:
McDonald's, which tripled the pay of its CEO last year, has offered its workers a budgeting guide that allows no money for heating, $20 a month for health insurance, and suggests they work an extra job if they want to make it.
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News Item (January): Senate Democrats back off from filibuster reform when Republicans agree to cooperate more.
News Item (July): Senate Democrats back off from filibuster reform when Republicans agree to cooperate more.
Lucy, have you seen that football?
It must be around here somewhere.
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News Headline: "Sen. Warren asks AG Holder why no Wall Street prosecutions"
News Headline: "In second term, Obama is seen as using 'hidden hand' approach"
And neither Penn nor Teller could hide it better.
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+ J..C., a Duluth, Ga., reader, regarding QT's asking its readers to stop playing games with President Obama's announcement that his favorite food is broccoli, writes:
"Lima bean hoping you would lettuce alone."
+ Stephen J. Smith, a Minneapolis reader, writes:
"Where all this will turn out romaines to be seen."
QT prides itself on good manners.
Would it be rutabaga stop to this?
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News Item: "...Some of the charges stem from an accusation of attempting to sell 513 straws of bull semen worth $20,000 without the owner's knowledge..."
Your day may not be going well, but at least you aren't under arrest for stealing bull semen.
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News Item: "Juror B37 of the Zimmerman trial first announced that she would be writing a book about the case, but then said she changed her mind when she grasped 'the depth of pain' over the case."
Probably nothing like the depth of pain felt when a book deal falls through.
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QT Grammar R Us Seminar on the English Language:
T.M., a Northbrook, Ill, reader, writes:
"So J.K. Rowling is writing under a pseudonym. Is that enchanting or is it bewitching?"
QT is still waiting for her to correct a problem under her real name:
...He raised his own wand, pointed it at Winky, and said, 'Ennervate!' Winky stirred feebly. Her great brown eyes opened...
"Enervate" does not mean, as many believe, to strengthen or awaken.
It means to weaken.
QT will attempt its own spell here:
Dictionario!
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Write to QT at zaysmith.qt@gmail.com
QT appears Monday, Wednesday, and Friday.
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A free daily digest of the biggest news stories of the day - and the best features from our website
Zay N. Smith is a Chicago writer. Before starting the QT column he worked at the Chicago Sun-Times as a reporter, foreign correspondent and writer of major features. He has also worked as a bartender, having played a key role in the 1978 Mirage Tavern investigation, in which the newspaper operated an undercover bar to document the breaking of many laws by many officials.
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