1. Nicki Minaj and Mariah Carey have also left American Idol
Surprise, surprise: After mountains of bad press and the worst ratings in the series' history, Mariah Carey and Nicki Minaj have announced that they won't be returning for another year as judges on American Idol. Just a few hours after Carey announced that she would leave the show to "focus on her upcoming tour," Minaj took to Twitter to announce that she would also be departing the series, leaving poor Keith Urban to judge all alone. It's been a troubled year for American Idol, but don't let all this turnover behind the scenes take away from your love of this year's American Idol winner — whatever her name was again.
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2. Kanye West doesn't want to be the only guy at Kim Kardashian's baby shower
If you're one of the lucky few on the guest list for Kim Kardashian's ultra-exclusive baby shower, don't expect to see her beau Kanye West in attendance. In an interview with Ryan Seacrest on KIIS-FM, sister Khloe Kardashian revealed that Kanye is so worried about the male-to-female ratio at Kim's upcoming baby shower that he might not attend. "Kanye says he feels like it's weird for him to be the only guy," said Khloe. "I'm like, it happens to all girls, so if all the guys come at the end, it's good." We assume West will also loudly contend that Beyonce had the best baby shower of all time.
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3. Sam Mendes will probably direct the next two James Bond movies
In direct contradiction to what everybody has been saying for months, Skyfall director Sam Mendes is reportedly slated to return as director for the next 007 film — tentatively titled Bond 24 — and is also in talks for Bond 25. Showbiz411 adds that while Daniel Craig is slated to appear as James Bond in both films, Adele is not likely to return to record the new theme song — but nevermind, they'll find someone like her.
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4. Nicolas Cage and Milla Jovovich are in talks for The Expendables 3
As Sylvester Stallone tries to find action stars who haven't already appeared in the Expendables franchise, he's reportedly in talks to check off two of the last big ones: Milla Jovovich and Nicolas Cage, whose blockbuster credentials and willingness to appear in terrible, unnecessary sequels for a paycheck make them perfect choices for The Expendables 3. If Stallone does manage to secure the stars, we can all start looking forward to The Expendables 4, which will presumably star Harrison Ford, Kurt Russell, and that big robot from Robocop.
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5. Justin Bieber's monkey finally has a home
Good news, everybody: After a long and troubling saga, Justin Bieber's monkey has finally found a new home. On what was presumably a very,very slow news day, the Associated Press checked back in with the monkey — which Bieber abandoned in Germany in March — and discovered that he had secured a home with six other capuchin monkeys in the Serengeti Park in Hodenhagen. The monkey seems to have moved on — which, if Bieber's relationship with Selena Gomez is any indication, means that the pop star will probably start obsessively trying to win him back.
