The daily gossip: Diane Warren saves a cow, Leslie Jones discovers steeplechase, and more

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1. Songwriter Diane Warren saves a cow from slaughterhouse, names her 'Free'
2. Leslie Jones loses her mind watching steeplechase
3. Ed Sheeran agrees that it's unoriginal to choose his music for a wedding song
4. Celine Dion confirms she did not betray Canada
5. Britney Spears' conservatorship battle could drag on for 'years'

published 25 June 2021

1. Songwriter Diane Warren saves a cow from slaughterhouse, names her 'Free'

Forty cows escaped a slaughterhouse and stampeded through a Los Angeles neighborhood earlier this week. Thirty-eight of them were returned to the factory, and one was shot and killed. With one cow on the loose, Grammy-winning songwriter Diane Warren stepped in. Warren, known for hits like "How Do I Live" and "Because You Loved Me" (both shockingly applicable to this situation), called the city and arranged to have the cow sent to a sanctuary. "This isn't my first cow I've saved. But this feels like a special cow," Warren said. "Her name is Free and she will get to live a free beautiful life." Warren refers to the story as a bright spot: "A little good moos when there's so much stuff that isn't good news," if you will.

If you think about it, a lot of Olympic sports are kind of ridiculous. But Olympics superfan Leslie Jones seemed especially baffled while watching the U.S. Track and Field Olympic trials on TV this week. "Wait a minute, is that like a roadblock they jumping over?" Jones marveled during the steeplechase competition, adding, "Okay, so like they horses...? I've never seen no s--t like that, what the actual — what the f--k." Jones really lost it, though, when she saw the competitors cross the water pit. "Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, so they gotta jump over roadblocks, and then a roadblock that got a puddle on the other side? What the actual f--k am I watching you guys?" As she neatly summed it up: "Olympics just making up s--t." Watch here.

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During an "unpopular opinion" segment on Radio 1, a caller declared "you're not original" if your first dance is an Ed Sheeran song, and the singer agreed. "It can be seen as, like, the done thing," he admitted, but with caveats. "If someone has picked it ... It's usually because it marks some sort of special time in their life with their partner," Sheeran explained. The songs aren't always the obvious choices of "Thinking Out Loud" or "Perfect," though that's not necessarily a good thing. "I had someone say 'Happier' once, which is a break-up tune. I was like, 'That's a bit …''' he trailed off. So at the end of the day, it's better to be basic than to curse your marriage by dancing to an Ed Sheeran break-up tune.

It is high treason in Canada to not support the local hockey team, which is why famous Québécois Celine Dion found herself facing everlasting national shame when the Vegas Golden Knights displayed her on the jumbotron in their team's jersey during Game 5 of the Conference Finals this week against the Montreal Canadiens. Dion, though, swiftly set the record straight: "By the way, I have nothing to do with this photo ... and you know what photo I'm talking about!" the Habs fan (and current Las Vegas resident) tweeted in French. The Canadiens promptly shared a photo of Dion with their team mascot and the caption "iconic duo" — then went on to beat the Golden Knights on Thursday to advance to their first Stanley Cup Final since 1993. How's that for having the last laugh and retaining one's Canadian Card?

Legal experts are warning it will be a "long" process to #FreeBritney. In court this week, Britney Spears, 39, asked a judge to end the "abusive" conservatorship she has been under since 2008, drawing widespread public support. But the complicated process to end it "could take years," The Guardian writes, citing attorney and conservatorship expert Scott Rahn. Family law attorney Christopher C. Melcher explained to Yahoo! Entertainment that Spears' next step will be to file a petition seeking to end the conservatorship. From there, though, Melcher told Yahoo, "it will take months to resolve. It could drag on to next year." MSNBC legal analyst Danny Cevallos added to NBC News that because "this is probably the most unique conservatorship case ever," the judge won't "terminate this conservatorship lightly or without ample evidence."

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Jeva Lange was the executive editor at TheWeek.com. She formerly served as The Week's deputy editor and culture critic. She is also a contributor to Screen Slate, and her writing has appeared in The New York Daily News, The Awl, Vice, and Gothamist, among other publications. Jeva lives in New York City. Follow her on Twitter.