Stephen Colbert mocks armed Oregon occupiers for requesting conditioner, French Vanilla creamer
We are in Week 2 of the occupation of Oregon's Malheur National Wildlife Refuge by Ammon Bundy and his armed group of anti-government protesters, Stephen Colbert said on Tuesday's Late Show, and the occupiers appear to be running low on supplies. They have put out a request for certain items, Colbert said, "so if you want to contribute to the anti-government group, just mail them supplies, and they will try to ignore the fact that it was delivered by a federal employee."
Colbert then turned to the items on the list, which include hamburgers, hot dogs, eggs, and other, arguably less-essential goods, like hair conditioner. "Yes, shampoo and conditioner," Colbert said, "because it's one thing to face off against the jack-booted thugs of a tyrannical government, it's another to have to fight the frizzies." They also want throw rugs and pillow cases, he added, but perhaps most entertainingly, these "rugged men o' the land" are pleading for French Vanilla creamer.
If the Bundy gang gets desperate, there's one last "slim possibility" for how they could get supplies, Colbert noted: "It turns out they're not surrounded, and there is absolutely no police presence, so they can come and go as they please." He offered them Google Maps directions to the closest Safeway, ending with some sage advice: "Do not give into the tyranny of the 10 Items or Less lane. Remember, freedom isn't free — and the French Vanilla creamer is, like, $2.99 a bottle." Watch below. Peter Weber
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Peter has worked as a news and culture writer and editor at The Week since the site's launch in 2008. He covers politics, world affairs, religion and cultural currents. His journalism career began as a copy editor at a financial newswire and has included editorial positions at The New York Times Magazine, Facts on File, and Oregon State University.
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