Speed Reads

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It's literally warmer on Mars than in Minnesota right now

If you haven't broken out your biggest, fluffiest puffer coat yet, you're either lucky enough to live in one of the few regions of the United States that isn't being pummeled by a giant winter storm, or you're going to want to get on that ASAP.

To put it more bluntly: It is really, really cold out there. An entire 80 percent of the country will have temperatures below freezing within the next week, CNN reports. The planet Mars — a giant space rock that is even farther from the sun than we are — boasted warmer temperatures this week than those being endured by the inhabitants of places like Minnesota, Illinois, and the Dakotas.

In some places, the wind chill factor will result in temperatures of 40 below zero, with 200 million people on wind-chill advisory through Friday. Manhattan is likely going to get blasted by 50 mile per hour winds in the morning as well, with gusts up to 60 miles per hour around Cape Cod and the Boston metropolitan area.

Put some hot cocoa on the stove, crank up the radiator, and do yourself a favor — don't go outside.