Speed Reads

The Daily Showdown

Trevor Noah notices the greatest hits Trump glaringly left out of his Phoenix rally

President Trump's strange campaign rally in Phoenix on Tuesday night "started with a bang," Trevor Noah said on Wednesday's Daily Show, but he was being sarcastic. It actually began with Vice President Mike Pence and HUD Secretary Ben Carson, there to "luke-warm up the crowd." After treating his audience to a Ben Carson impersonation, Noah played some of Trump's "fire and fury," stopping at the part where Trump threatened to shut down the government if Congress doesn't give him money for his Mexico border wall.

"What do you mean, the government's going to shut down?" he asked, indignantly. "Mexico pays for the wall! That's the only reason I watch the rallies, is to see the hits. You can't just change the words to your songs, Trump!"

"Now, although most of Trump's rally was an outstanding rejection of sanity," Noah said, "there was a key issue he had to address, and that was demanding justice for the real victim of Charlottesville: himself." Trump spent about 15 minutes reading parts of the evolving and devolving statements he gave after the violent Charlottesville white supremacist rally, and Noah played some of the video, shaking his head. "I'm so glad we didn't elect an irrational woman as president," he joked.

But of course, Trump carefully omitted the newsworthy parts of his statements. "You can't leave out 'on many sides,'" Noah protested. "That was the whole reason people were mad." In any case, Trump managed to divide America further, and the Trump side doesn't sound so bad, Noah said, playing part of an interview with a Trump supporter. "You know, in a way I envy these Trump supporters, because they're living in a state of bliss," he said. "For everyone else, Trump's presidency is a little more painful." Watch below. Peter Weber