"I've got good news and I've got bad news," Stephen Colbert, "that guy from CBS," said on Tuesday's Late Show. "The bad news is I lied, there's no good news." In a 5-4 vote Tuesday, the Supreme Court "fell for" President Trump's argument that his Muslim ban was really a "travel ban," he explained. "Oooh, 5-4 — this close to being able to look our grandchildren in the eye." Chief Justice John Roberts ignored all of Trump's anti-Muslim comments to reach his decision and ruled that Trump's campaign rhetoric may not be legally determinative. "So the things he said during the campaign may not be true?" Colbert deadpanned. "Wait! Does that mean he's not making America great?"
Trump celebrated the decision on Twitter and with congressional Republicans, then laid out his new immigration plan: "I'm sorry, you can't come in." Hey, Colbert said, "stop stealing your ideas from the sign on Melania's door." Trump also offered some puzzling thoughts on finding immigration judges. "All right, who had 'Make barbers judges' on their Trump meltdown pool?" Colbert asked. "I was close; I had 'Appoint golden retriever to the Supreme Court.'"
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