Last Night on Late Night
"In a new interview, President Biden defended his handling of the U.S. troop withdrawal from Afghanistan, and said, 'I don't think it was a failure' — but he said it the same way you would compliment your friend's play," Seth Meyers demonstrated on Thursday's Late Show. "The new host of Jeopardy!, Mike Richards, apologized yesterday for sexist comments he made on a podcast. At this rate, he's gonna be the first Jeopardy! host to actually invoke double jeopardy. 'Objection, I already got in trouble for that one. What? Oh, sorry. What is, Objection...'"
Yes, for some reason, "the big story everybody's talking about right now continues to be the chaos surrounding the recent, poorly handled regime change over at Jeopardy!" Stephen Colbert said at The Late Show. "In 2014, Mike Richard made crude crude comments about women, Jews, and Haiti," he explained. "Oooh, looks like Richards' job may be in ... jeopardy." But the controversy about his hire started even earlier, after Jeopardy! executive producers hired Richards, a Jeopardy! executive producer, for the gig. "Wow, what are the odds?" Colbert deadpanned. "Exactly the same as me getting named Stephen Colbert Magazine's Sexiest Man Alive."
"Speaking of disastrous transitions, What is Afghanistan?" Colbert said.
Colbert focused Biden's ABC News interview, but The Late Show mocked the Taliban's rebranding pretensions. "I come to you with a proclamation that for the world: We, the Taliban, are now woke AF - ghanistan. See what I did there?"
"Earlier today, OnlyFans announced that its going to block all X-rated content starting in October," Jimmy Fallon said on The Tonight Show. "What? This would be like Playboy only printing the articles." And "Amazon is planning to open several department stores in the U.S," he added. "Yeah, it's all part of Amazon's plan to put Amazon out of business."
Well, Amazon founder Jeff Bezos is once again the world's richest man, even after his recent divorce, Sean Hayes said on Jimmy Kimmel Live. "That's like, I don't know, still being the tallest person in the world after getting your legs cut off."