Good week, Bad week

Good week for:

Generosity, after an unidentified man walked into a Boston Starbucks, shouted, “I’m rich, I’m rich!” and tossed a blizzard of $1 bills in the air. Customers were so startled that they didn’t grab the cash, which an employee donated to relief efforts in Japan.

Giving up drugs, after former Van Halen guitarist Sammy Hagar claimed that aliens once visited him and “plugged into me,” changing him forever. “They uploaded something from my brain, like an experiment,” Hagar said. “It was real.’’

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Paying whatever the gas station charges, after a house in Van Buren County, Mich., was totally destroyed when two barrels of gasoline stored in the basement caught fire and exploded. The owner said she was stockpiling the gas because of rising prices.

Bad week for:

David Charles Schubert, the Las Vegas assistant district attorney who prosecuted Paris Hilton and singer Bruno Mars on cocaine charges, after he was charged with buying crack cocaine.

President Obama, after beauty expert Rebekah George said that Obama appeared 10 years older than he did when he took office. George said that not only is the 49-year-old president’s hair grayer, but his face shows the telltale wrinkles and sunken mouth created by the stress hormone cortisol.

Crushes, after a 92-year-old Florida woman fired four bullets at her 53-year-old neighbor’s house and car, when he refused her demand for a kiss. “I thought this only happened to younger people,’’ sighed Dwight Bettner, the woman’s target.