This week’s question: A Seychelles giant tortoise named Jonathan recently turned 191. Despite being the world’s oldest living land animal, he still has a "keen" appetite and a "good libido," said a veterinarian. In seven or fewer words, come up with a thoughtful birthday card message for Jonathan.
Click here to see the results of last week's contest: Rock tattoo
The Week
Escape your echo chamber. Get the facts behind the news, plus analysis from multiple perspectives.
Sign up for The Week's Free Newsletters
From our morning news briefing to a weekly Good News Newsletter, get the best of The Week delivered directly to your inbox.
From our morning news briefing to a weekly Good News Newsletter, get the best of The Week delivered directly to your inbox.
THE WINNER: Have you thought of running for president?
SECOND PLACE: Congratulations, Keith Richards is jealous
THIRD PLACE: “OK, OK, You Win!” Signed, the hare
Daniel Hicks, Randolph, Massachusetts
Party like it’s 1899
Keep on creepin’ on!
Ramona Rush, Lexington, Kentucky
You don't look a day over Neolithic!
Joel Nelson, Goleta, California
-
Pipe bombs: The end of a conspiracy theory?Feature Despite Bongino and Bondi’s attempt at truth-telling, the MAGAverse is still convinced the Deep State is responsible
-
The robot revolutionFeature Advances in tech and AI are producing android machine workers. What will that mean for humans?
-
Health: Will Kennedy dismantle U.S. immunization policy?Feature ‘America’s vaccine playbook is being rewritten by people who don’t believe in them’
-
Quiz of The Week: 6 – 12 DecemberQuiz Have you been paying attention to The Week’s news?
-
The Week contest: No smokingPuzzles and Quizzes
-
Magazine solutions - December 12, 2025Puzzles and Quizzes Issue - December 12, 2025
-
Quiz of The Week: 29 November – 5 DecemberQuiz Have you been paying attention to The Week’s news?
-
The Week contest: Primate peckPuzzles and Quizzes
-
Magazine solutions - December 5, 2025
Puzzles and Quizzes Issue - December 5, 2025
-
Quiz of The Week: 22 – 28 NovemberQuiz Have you been paying attention to The Week’s news?
-
Magazine solutions - November 28, 2025
Puzzles and Quizzes Issue - November 28, 2025
