For the past two weeks, millions of Americans have crowded into bars and television dens to watch the World Cup. Today, millions of Americans are huddled over their desks, half-working while they watch the USA-Germany World Cup match in the background.
If only they had known that their interest in the tournament was destroying the country they call home. Need evidence? Just ask Fox News staple Ann Coulter, who recently wrote a column arguing that "any growing interest in soccer can only be a sign of the nation's moral decay."
Coulter's case against soccer is far-ranging: it's "foreign," you can't use your hands, liberal moms like it, and it doesn't "present a constant threat of personal disgrace." "If more 'Americans' are watching soccer today, it's only because of the demographic switch effected by Teddy Kennedy's 1965 immigration law," she concludes. "I promise you: No American whose great-grandfather was born here is watching soccer."
To read the rest of Coulter's screed — if only for your own amusement — click over to her official website.