Speed Reads

Late Night Tackles President Trump

Stephen Colbert braces for Trump's inauguration, 'inevitable like death and never seeing his taxes'

When Thursday's Late Show aired, Donald Trump's presidential inauguration was just over 12 hours away. "It's real," Stephen Colbert said. "It's happening. We all knew this day would come — it's inevitable, like death and never seeing his taxes." Once he's sworn in, "no one is really sure what Trump is gonna do in office — it's a grab bag," Colbert said. But Trump did tell The Washington Post that his plan to Make America Great Again is essentially to tell America it is now great. "America will be great when he says it is, okay?" Colbert said. "It's like your dad saying, 'You love Colonial Williamsburg! We drove all the way down here from St. Louis, you are having fun, mister. This is fun!'"

Trump also said he plans on bringing back military parades, to show America that its rebuilt military is great, too. But that doesn't mean Trump will be some sort of cold-hearted dictator, like North Korea's Kim Jong Un or Tiananmen Square massacre-era China, Colbert assured everyone, noting that Trump showed his soft side with a free inaugural concert at the Lincoln Memorial. Like all presidents-elect, Trump entered to music, he explained, "but instead of 'Hail to the Chief,' our new, loving president entered to.... 'Heart of Stone,'" the Rolling Stones song. "I hope he was talking about the statue of Lincoln behind him," Colbert said nervously. He ended his monologue poking fun at Rick Perry. Watch below. Peter Weber