Trevor Noah has a plausible reason Trump slurred his Jerusalem speech. Stephen Colbert just laughed.
President Trump announced Wednesday that the U.S. now recognizes Jerusalem as the capital of Israel, blowing up what was left of the Israeli-Palestinian peace effort. "As disturbing as it was today to watch Donald Trump add fuel to the Middle East conflict, it was even more disturbing to watch the conflict between Donald Trump's teeth and his tongue," Trevor Noah said on Wednesday's Daily Show. He played parts of the speech where Trump was visibly slurring his words, laughed, played it again, then offered some theories.
Some people were concerned Trump had a stroke, but Noah said "it seemed like someone hit him with a blowdart just before he went out to make the speech," or perhaps "like he just had a drink will Bill Cosby." Then he made his final diagnosis. "President Trump is wearing dentures, people," Noah said. "Think about it: fake teeth, fake hair, fake tan — there's no part of his body that's real." Look, he added, "there's no shame in having dentures — but there is shame in Donald Trump having dentures, because he's vain as hell."
At The Late Show, Stephen Colbert couldn't stop laughing at Trump's last slurred words, "United Shursh," so he played it twice. Everybody opposed Trump's Jerusalem decision, he said, so why did he do it? One explanation is he's fulfilling a promise to conservative pro-Israel groups and donors, but evangelical Christians also back the move as a way to spark the second coming of Jesus Christ. The Late Show "God" appeared to quash that idea. "Are you crazy?" he said. "I'm not going to send my Son into that tinder box! Didn't go so well last time." He's not going to Jerusalem, either, "God" said. "I'm not even sure it's my holy city anymore. I'm thinking of moving it somewhere more laid back, like Austin. It's my favorite city in the whole United Shursh." Watch below. Peter Weber
The Week
Escape your echo chamber. Get the facts behind the news, plus analysis from multiple perspectives.
Sign up for The Week's Free Newsletters
From our morning news briefing to a weekly Good News Newsletter, get the best of The Week delivered directly to your inbox.
From our morning news briefing to a weekly Good News Newsletter, get the best of The Week delivered directly to your inbox.
A free daily email with the biggest news stories of the day – and the best features from TheWeek.com
Peter has worked as a news and culture writer and editor at The Week since the site's launch in 2008. He covers politics, world affairs, religion and cultural currents. His journalism career began as a copy editor at a financial newswire and has included editorial positions at The New York Times Magazine, Facts on File, and Oregon State University.
-
A lemon-shaped exoplanet is squeezing what we know about planet formationUnder the radar It may be made from a former star
-
Political cartoons for January 4Cartoons Sunday's political cartoons include a resolution to learn a new language, and new names in Hades and on battleships
-
The ultimate films of 2025 by genreThe Week Recommends From comedies to thrillers, documentaries to animations, 2025 featured some unforgettable film moments
-
Son arrested over killing of Rob and Michele ReinerSpeed Read Nick, the 32-year-old son of Hollywood director Rob Reiner, has been booked for the murder of his parents
-
Rob Reiner, wife dead in ‘apparent homicide’speed read The Reiners, found in their Los Angeles home, ‘had injuries consistent with being stabbed’
-
Hungary’s Krasznahorkai wins Nobel for literatureSpeed Read László Krasznahorkai is the author of acclaimed novels like ‘The Melancholy of Resistance’ and ‘Satantango’
-
Primatologist Jane Goodall dies at 91Speed Read She rose to fame following her groundbreaking field research with chimpanzees
-
Florida erases rainbow crosswalk at Pulse nightclubSpeed Read The colorful crosswalk was outside the former LGBTQ nightclub where 49 people were killed in a 2016 shooting
-
Trump says Smithsonian too focused on slavery's illsSpeed Read The president would prefer the museum to highlight 'success,' 'brightness' and 'the future'
-
Trump to host Kennedy Honors for Kiss, StalloneSpeed Read Actor Sylvester Stallone and the glam-rock band Kiss were among those named as this year's inductees
-
White House seeks to bend Smithsonian to Trump's viewSpeed Read The Smithsonian Institution's 21 museums are under review to ensure their content aligns with the president's interpretation of American history
