Democratic presidential candidate Sen. Elizabeth Warren (D-Mass.) "has shot to the top of the polls thanks to her support among college graduates, Hispanic voters, and kids who ate lunch with their English teachers in middle school," Trevor Noah joked on Wednesday's Daily Show. "But there is one demographic who hears Elizabeth Warren and immediately s--ts their Armani suits. ... Yes, Wall Street bankers are more terrified of Elizabeth Warren than they are of a surprise gust of wind. 'Oh no, my cocaine! Waaah!'"
"It's not surprising that the people of Wall Street are afraid, because Elizabeth Warren has proposed some of the most progressive financial policies in years," Noah said. "Things like breaking up the big banks, increasing taxes on the ultra-wealthy, and making it easier for normal people to join the Illuminati — that's like a big thing." At the same time, "it's kind of hard to take the Wall Street crowd seriously," he said, because "this isn't the first time they've predicted the end of the world. ... Yes, for both Trump and Obama, analysts claimed that the stock market would tank. But do you know what actually happened? The exact opposite. It's been going up for 10 years."
Subscribe to The Week
Escape your echo chamber. Get the facts behind the news, plus analysis from multiple perspectives.
Sign up for The Week's Free Newsletters
From our morning news briefing to a weekly Good News Newsletter, get the best of The Week delivered directly to your inbox.
From our morning news briefing to a weekly Good News Newsletter, get the best of The Week delivered directly to your inbox.
-
Depleted FEMA struggling as hurricane season beginsspeed read FEMA has lost a third of its workforce amid DOGE cuts enforced by President Donald Trump
-
June 3 editorial cartoonsCartoons Tuesday's political cartoons include RFK Jr. and the CDC, Elon Musk's DOGE exit, and Donald Trump versus academic freedom
-
Gaza Humanitarian Foundation: the group behind Gaza's controversial new aid programmeThe Explainer Deadly shootings and chaotic scenes have been reported at aid sites after US group replaced UN humanitarian organisations
-
Crypto firm Coinbase hacked, faces SEC scrutinySpeed Read The Securities and Exchange Commission has also been investigating whether Coinbase misstated its user numbers in past disclosures
-
Starbucks baristas strike over dress codespeed read The new uniform 'puts the burden on baristas' to buy new clothes, said a Starbucks Workers United union delegate
-
Warren Buffet announces surprise retirementspeed read At the annual meeting of Berkshire Hathaway, the billionaire investor named Vice Chairman Greg Abel his replacement
-
Trump calls Amazon's Bezos over tariff displaySpeed Read The president was not happy with reports that Amazon would list the added cost from tariffs alongside product prices
-
Markets notch worst quarter in years as new tariffs loomSpeed Read The S&P 500 is on track for its worst month since 2022 as investors brace for Trump's tariffs
-
Tesla Cybertrucks recalled over dislodging panelsSpeed Read Almost every Cybertruck in the US has been recalled over a stainless steel panel that could fall off
-
Crafting emporium Joann is going out of businessSpeed Read The 82-year-old fabric and crafts store will be closing all 800 of its stores
-
Trump's China tariffs start after Canada, Mexico pausesSpeed Read The president paused his tariffs on America's closest neighbors after speaking to their leaders, but his import tax on Chinese goods has taken effect
