Stephen Colbert and Seth Meyers don't find Trump's 'impeachment light' act persuasive

The near-certainty that he will be impeached next week is privately "weighing heavenly on Donald Trump," despite his public attempts to minimize the moment, CNN reports. And so, "with impeachment closing in, last night Trump went to his happy place: anger," Stephen Colbert said on Wednesday's Late Show.

"Impeachment was clearly on the president's mind," at a raucous Tuesday night rally in Hershey, Pennsylvania, Colbert said, noting Trump's new "impeachment light" line. "Yes, it's impeachment light. America's going on a diet — we've gotta lose 239 pounds of dead weight." He played some of Trump's other hits, like his "fresh mouth" jab at Sen. Elizabeth Warren (D-Mass.): "That is some old-school sexism — or maybe Trump's just not used to women talking."

"By the end of the night, the president seemed to get a little sleepy, which led to some trouble speaking," Colbert said. "He's going after the evangelical vote by speaking in tongues." But Trump did tell "a beautiful story" about saving marriages with 401(k) growth, he deadpanned. "This is really going to resonate with actual people in real, totally not-made-up marriages. In fact, the Trump campaign has already turned this story into an ad."

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And speaking of Trump campaign ads...

"Trump went to such lengths to sooth his ego in the face of a historic political reckoning that at one point, he literally gave himself credit for saving peoples' marriages with an obviously made-up story," Seth Meyers said at Late Night. "First of all, if your spouse thought you were a dumb, stupid dope until your 401(k) went up, your marriage still has problems. I do wonder where Trump got the idea that wives only love their husbands if they have a lot of money — I guess we'll never know."

"Trump is obviously rattled by the fact that he's about to become the third president ever in history to impeached," Meyer said. "No matter what happens next, Trump's name will be emblazoned in history as one of only three presidents to be impeached, and that will follow him forever." And "impeachment light" won't change that, he added. "You're either impeached or you're not — there's no light version. Trump's like a drunk guy at a bar on his sixth beer, going 'It's Impeachment Light! Now, gimme my keys!'" Watch below. Peter Weber