Stephen Colbert and Jimmy Fallon gape at the 27-hour I-95 snow-in, round up 'dumb' COVID comments
With some schools closing on only a few hours' notice due to surging COVID-19 numbers, many "parents need emergency child-care help now," Stephen Colbert said on Tuesday's Late Show. "I am calling on the federal government to release our strategic reserve of mothers-in-law."
And "we've got an update from the opposite of schools, Florida," Colbert joked. "Omicron is hitting Florida hard. In fact, in two weeks, COVID cases rose there by 948 percent," but "Florida has a surefire bring their number of cases down, thanks to Florida Surgeon General Dr. Joseph Ladapo." That solution? "Unwind" Florida's "testing psychology." Well, "this no-testing approach isn't surprising," he added. "Ladapo has a long history of being what the Orlando Sentinel called a 'COVID crank' — COVID crank, also the most popular drug in Florida, because in Florida, even the meth has COVID."
Sen. Ron Johnson (R-Fla.) also said "dumb stuff about COVID," telling right-wing radio listeners "interested in the vaccine to get a second opinion — from God," Colbert said. "I get it, God created our immune system — but He also created Ron Johnson, so He has been known to shank it." Johnson "raised the question: Does the Lord want you to have the vaccine?" he noted. "I don't know, but take Ron Johnson's advice and you might have a chance to ask God face to face."
Subscribe to The Week
Escape your echo chamber. Get the facts behind the news, plus analysis from multiple perspectives.
Sign up for The Week's Free Newsletters
From our morning news briefing to a weekly Good News Newsletter, get the best of The Week delivered directly to your inbox.
From our morning news briefing to a weekly Good News Newsletter, get the best of The Week delivered directly to your inbox.
If you do test positive for COVID, "right now there's probably no better place on the planet to quarantine than I-95 in Virginia, where cars have been trapped in a traffic jam for nearly 27 hours," Colbert said. "Holy Never Getting to Toledo!"
Yes, "because of a huge winter storm, a 50-mile stretch of I-95 in Virginia was shut down and drivers were stranded on the interstate for more than 24 hours," Jimmy Fallon said on The Tonight Show. "Meanwhile, there was a dad sitting there like, 'If I can just get over the one lane....' The only happy person was the cab driver whose fare got up to $14 million."
"This week Twitter permanently banned congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Greene after she kept posting misinformation, but just because she got kicked off of Twitter doesn't mean that she's not posting on other sites," Fallon said. The fake posts included a rant about the D.C. snowstorm and Jews using space lasers to control the weather.
The Daily Show's Desi Lydic, like Fallon, needled the CDC for its shifting COVID guidance.
Sign up for Today's Best Articles in your inbox
A free daily email with the biggest news stories of the day – and the best features from TheWeek.com
Peter has worked as a news and culture writer and editor at The Week since the site's launch in 2008. He covers politics, world affairs, religion and cultural currents. His journalism career began as a copy editor at a financial newswire and has included editorial positions at The New York Times Magazine, Facts on File, and Oregon State University.
-
Cautious optimism surrounds plans for the world's first nuclear fusion power plant
Talking Point Some in the industry feel that the plant will face many challenges
By Justin Klawans, The Week US Published
-
Explore new worlds this winter at these 6 enlightening museum exhibitions
The Week Recommends Discover the estrados of Spain and the connection between art and chess in various African countries
By Catherine Garcia, The Week US Published
-
2024: the year of Black country artists
In the Spotlight Beyoncé debuted 'Cowboy Carter' at the top of the country charts, shining a spotlight on artists like Shaboozey
By Theara Coleman, The Week US Published
-
Top Russian general killed in Moscow blast
Speed Read A remote-triggered bomb killed Lt. Gen. Igor Kirillov, the head of Russia's Nuclear, Biological and Chemical Defense
By Peter Weber, The Week US Published
-
Why Assad fell so fast
The Explainer The newly liberated Syria is in an incredibly precarious position, but it's too soon to succumb to defeatist gloom
By The Week UK Published
-
NATO chief urges Europe to arm against Russia
Speed Read Mark Rutte said Putin wants to 'wipe Ukraine off the map' and might come for other parts of Europe next
By Peter Weber, The Week US Published
-
New Syria government takes charge, urging 'stability'
Speed Read The rebel forces that ousted Syrian leader Bashar al-Assad announced an interim government
By Peter Weber, The Week US Published
-
Romania's election rerun
The Explainer Shock result of presidential election has been annulled following allegations of Russian interference
By Sorcha Bradley, The Week UK Published
-
Russia's shadow war in Europe
Talking Point Steering clear of open conflict, Moscow is slowly ratcheting up the pressure on Nato rivals to see what it can get away with.
By The Week UK Published
-
South Korea roiled by short-lived martial law
Speed Read President Yoon Suk Yeol's imposition of martial law was a 'clear violation of the constitution,' said the opposition parties who have moved to impeach him
By Rafi Schwartz, The Week US Published
-
Syrian rebels seize Aleppo in surprise offensive
Speed Read The rebels made gains against President Bashar al-Assad’s forces and reignited Syria's 13-year-old civil war
By Peter Weber, The Week US Published