Good week for:
Stunts, after the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention posted an emergency guide for how to respond to an attack by flesh-eating zombies. The page, posted to draw traffic to the CDC website, became so popular that the server went down.
Having a bark worse than your bite, after a tiny, yapping teacup poodle confronted a 200-pound black bear that had wandered into his owner’s Washington state yard. The frightened bear climbed up a tree, jumped into a neighbor’s yard, and fled.
Noodling, the popular Southern tradition of catching catfish by hand, after the Texas legislature reversed a long-standing ban on the practice. “I personally don’t noodle, but I would defend to the death your right to do so,” said State Sen. Bob Deuell.
Bad week for:
A balanced diet, after Don Gorske of Fond du Lac, Wis., ate his 25,000th McDonald’s Big Mac. “I plan on eating Big Macs until I die,” said Gorske, who eats two for lunch every single day. His cholesterol was recently tested at a very low 156.
Steven McCormack, a New Zealand trucker whose skin was pierced by the fitting of a compressed air hose. As air was forced into his body at 100 pounds per square inch, McCormack said, “I was blowing up like a football.’’ He was rescued by co-workers.
Taking your work home, after NASCAR superstar Kyle Busch was arrested in North Carolina for allegedly driving his new Lexus sports car at 128 mph in a 45 mph zone. “I got carried away,” said an apologetic Busch.