Gray divorce is on the rise and it can have major financial implications
Divorce that occurs later in life between older adults presents particular challenges


Divorce at any age isn't easy, but when it occurs later in life, spousal separation can present some unique challenges, particularly financially. As the rate of gray divorce — defined as divorce that occurs later in life between older adults — ticks up, those challenges are becoming more readily apparent.
"Both partners see their wealth decline by half" on the heels of a divorce later in life, said USA Today, based on a recent report by researchers at Bowling Green State University in Ohio. However, the impact on standard of living isn't necessarily felt equally. While "a man can expect his standard of living to decline by 21% after a gray divorce," a woman can anticipate her "standard of living will plunge by 45%."
Why does gray divorce bring distinct financial challenges?
While divorce at any age requires untangling a merged life, with gray divorce, "you'll need to contend with decades of combining your finances and assets with your spouse in a divorce settlement," not to mention "things like your estate plan, any college savings plans for grandchildren or any other long-term funds or plans," said SmartAsset.
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Further, said CNBC, "financial disparities seem to be more muted for younger generations of women due to a greater likelihood of them working relative to older cohorts." This is in large part related to the fact that "many older adults who divorce today adhered to the traditional notion of a man as a household's sole breadwinner."
How can you protect yourself financially in the event of gray divorce?
While hopefully gray divorce is never a reality you have to contend with, it's always wise to think ahead in case the worst should happen.
For one, said CNBC, you should make an effort to "get active in your household finances." Neither spouse should "get to a point where they're unaware of their household's spending, savings, and mortgage payments and interest rates" — otherwise, "such information could come as a surprise upon divorce." Staying involved also ensures you're not rusty on the ins and outs of financial management in case you ever need to take on the task solo one day.
Secondly, it's important to "have access to your own money," said CNBC. While it's far from uncommon for spouses to merge their financial accounts, it's still important for each partner to "ensure they have access to their own funds so their spouse can't shut off the financial spigot if a relationship sours." You might even consider starting to save for retirement or investing in an account of your own, just so you have that in case you ever were to need it.
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And finally, even if you're already married, it's not too late to draw up a postnuptial agreement "that contains provisions to protect a woman financially if she leaves the workforce to care for their children, for example," said CNBC, citing Natalie Colley, a CFP based in New York and senior lead advisor at Francis Financial.
What considerations should you keep in mind while going through a gray divorce?
If you are going through a gray divorce, there are a number of considerations to keep in mind.
For one, said Kiplinger, it's helpful to "assemble a team: lawyers, financial planners, accountants" to help you navigate the divorce process. Also make sure you are vetting the people you hire. For instance, said Kiplinger, you'll want to "beware of any lawyer who says you can 'win' without pausing to understand your circumstances or motivations."
Second, it's important to try to remain as realistic as possible, even though emotions will likely be running high. When it comes to your marital home, for example, "consider all the costs of owning and maintaining that home before you decide who gets it — if anyone," said USA Today.
And even if you feel tempted to cling to your old way of life, be prepared to make budgetary adjustments as needed. Not only will "your retirement will take a big hit in the aftermath of a gray divorce," said SmartAsset, but "you'll also need to plan for health insurance coverage and the inevitable cost," as typically "when spouses split, the dependent spouse will lose health insurance coverage."
Becca Stanek has worked as an editor and writer in the personal finance space since 2017. She previously served as a deputy editor and later a managing editor overseeing investing and savings content at LendingTree and as an editor at the financial startup SmartAsset, where she focused on retirement- and financial-adviser-related content. Before that, Becca was a staff writer at The Week, primarily contributing to Speed Reads.
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