Speed Reads

Who do you fight for?

Staten Island lawyer and Game of Thrones fan requests trial by combat

How do you fight absurdity? With more absurdity, of course. At least that's the game plan of Staten Island lawyer Richard A. Luthmann, who's taking a play straight from Tyrion Lannister's book. Luthmann, who is accused of aiding a client's fraudulent transfer, believes the allegations against him are so ridiculous that they don't warrant a traditional defense. Instead, he's suggesting a proper Game of Thrones-style battle to the death. He filed his request in a very terse brief to the Staten Island Supreme Court:

"The allegations made by plaintiffs, aided and abetted by their counsel, border upon the criminal. As such, the undersigned (Luthmann) respectfully requests that the court permit the undersigned to dispatch plaintiffs and their counsel to the Divine Providence of the Maker for Him to exact His divine judgment once the undersigned has released the souls of the plaintiffs and their counsel from their corporeal bodies, personally and or by way of a champion.” [The Independent]

Luthmann, who admits he's a fan of Game of Thrones, notes that neither New York nor the United States has outlawed trials by combat, making the battle perfectly legal — so all they need now is a giant mountainside castle with a gaping hole in the middle.