Stephen Colbert finds an unlikely loophole in the WHO's red meat-cancer warning


On Monday's Late Show, Stephen Colbert talked about the disgusting amount of hot dogs that contain human DNA, and "the sad meat news keeps on coming," he said on Tuesday's show. He was referring, of course, to the World Health Organization's warning that processed meats like bacon, sausage, and salami — plus perhaps all red meat — increases your odds of getting cancer. "How can cured meat be bad for you?" Colbert implored. "It has the word 'cured' right in the name." This is personal for him, he added, since bacon is the only thing that gets his two teenage sons out of bed in the morning.
"Now, according to 'doctors,' I can't smoke and I can't eat bacon," Colbert said. "But they haven't said anything about smoking bacon." And so he did. His verdict? "That is actually better than I imagined," he said, laughing. "But be careful: The pork these days is so much stronger than it was in the '60s." The pot jokes gave way to mocking the smug vegetarians ("which is redundant, by the way" Colbert joked) who got "all veggier than thou" about the study. And he hit where it hurt: veggie hot dogs — which, it turns out, also often contain both meat and human DNA. Colbert wrapped it all up in the only way he could: "So vegetarians, stick that in your pipe and smoke it." Watch below. Peter Weber
Subscribe to The Week
Escape your echo chamber. Get the facts behind the news, plus analysis from multiple perspectives.

Sign up for The Week's Free Newsletters
From our morning news briefing to a weekly Good News Newsletter, get the best of The Week delivered directly to your inbox.
From our morning news briefing to a weekly Good News Newsletter, get the best of The Week delivered directly to your inbox.
Sign up for Today's Best Articles in your inbox
A free daily email with the biggest news stories of the day – and the best features from TheWeek.com
Peter has worked as a news and culture writer and editor at The Week since the site's launch in 2008. He covers politics, world affairs, religion and cultural currents. His journalism career began as a copy editor at a financial newswire and has included editorial positions at The New York Times Magazine, Facts on File, and Oregon State University.
-
Book reviews: ‘Red Scare: Blacklists, McCarthyism, and the Making of Modern America’ and ‘How to End a Story: Collected Diaries, 1978–1998’
Feature A political ‘witch hunt’ and Helen Garner’s journal entries
By The Week US Published
-
The backlash against ChatGPT's Studio Ghibli filter
The Explainer The studio's charming style has become part of a nebulous social media trend
By Theara Coleman, The Week US Published
-
Why are student loan borrowers falling behind on payments?
Today's Big Question Delinquencies surge as the Trump administration upends the program
By Joel Mathis, The Week US Published
-
New Mexico to investigate death of Gene Hackman, wife
speed read The Oscar-winning actor and his wife Betsy Arakawa were found dead in their home with no signs of foul play
By Peter Weber, The Week US Published
-
Giant schnauzer wins top prize at Westminster show
Speed Read Monty won best in show at the 149th Westminster Kennel Club dog show
By Peter Weber, The Week US Published
-
Beyoncé, Kendrick Lamar take top Grammys
Speed Read Beyoncé took home album of the year for 'Cowboy Carter' and Kendrick Lamar's diss track 'Not Like Us' won five awards
By Peter Weber, The Week US Published
-
The Louvre is giving 'Mona Lisa' her own room
Speed Read The world's most-visited art museum is getting a major renovation
By Peter Weber, The Week US Published
-
Honda and Nissan in merger talks
Speed Read The companies are currently Japan's second and third-biggest automakers, respectively
By Peter Weber, The Week US Published
-
Taylor Swift wraps up record-shattering Eras tour
Speed Read The pop star finally ended her long-running tour in Vancouver, Canada
By Peter Weber, The Week US Published
-
Drake claims illegal boosting, defamation
Speed Read The rapper accused Universal Music of boosting Kendrick Lamar's diss track and said UMG allowed him to be falsely accused of pedophilia
By Rafi Schwartz, The Week US Published
-
'Wicked' and 'Gladiator II' ignite holiday box office
Speed Read The combination of the two movies revitalized a struggling box office
By Peter Weber, The Week US Published