Stephen Colbert looks at the GOP's remaining options to stop Donald Trump, shivers

Stephen Colbert doesn&#039;t like the Republican Party&#039;s remaining choices

(Image credit: Late Show)

last updated 17 March 2016

Stephen Colbert often eases his viewers into his segments about the 2016 election with some sort of transition. On Wednesday's Late Show, it was The Bachelor, thanks to ex-bachelor Ben and his pick, Lauren, being in the audience. "Of course, the reality show everyone's talking about is the presidential election," Colbert said, and this week's big episode was the five states that voted on Tuesday. "People were calling it Super Tuesday Part III, and like all sequels, it's getting predictable and very expensive," he said.

Colbert began with the Democratic side, noting that Hillary Clinton beat Bernie Sanders in all five states, including Florida. "It is just so sad to see Bernie betrayed by the people he most resembles," he said, then moved on to the "interesting" race. He noted that Marco Rubio dropped out of the GOP contest after losing Florida to Donald Trump, then looked at who's left. Ohio Gov. John Kasich won his home state — his first victory — then said he would win the nomination. Kasich is high, Colbert suggested, "because to secure the nomination at the convention in Cleveland this summer, Kasich would have to get 116 percent of the remaining delegates. We'd have to make him governor of every remaining state, plus some states we don't even have yet," like North Kentucksylvania and Massachippissippi. He had especial fun with Massachippissippi.

That leaves Sen. Ted Cruz, whom Colbert brought up with a mixture of ghost-story and horror-movie special effects. "Mathematically, Cruz is the only guy remaining who can beat Donald Trump" — unless Republicans have a brokered convention, Colbert said, where delegates are free to vote for whomever they choose after nobody wins on the first ballot. That would be "great news," he said: "The Republican campaign could start all over again, only this time it's crammed into one week — you can binge-watch the death of the GOP." Colbert had one more analogy, and it's pretty good, too. Watch below. Peter Weber

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Peter has worked as a news and culture writer and editor at The Week since the site's launch in 2008. He covers politics, world affairs, religion and cultural currents. His journalism career began as a copy editor at a financial newswire and has included editorial positions at The New York Times Magazine, Facts on File, and Oregon State University.