Stephen Colbert joked on Monday's Late Show that he considered not returning from last week's vacation "because, uh, everything," but he didn't want to miss new National Security Adviser John Bolton's first day of work.
Colbert then turned to the latest developments in the Stormy Daniels saga, joking that "future generations will learn all about it in the Trump Presidential Library's adult section." But the payoff to Daniels by Trump's longtime lawyer and fixer Michael Cohen landed in the news Monday with an FBI raid on Cohen's office and home. Raiding a lawyer's office is tricky, given attorney-client privilege, so the Justice Department sends out a team of lawyers to review material before prosecutors can look at it. Colbert had a good, mostly family-friendly laugh at the name of these teams.
"'Taint team' — gotta take that to a taint team, because it t'ain't ethical and it t'ain't legal," he joked. "By the way, fun fact: Taint Team, one of Stormy Daniels' best movies." Still, Colbert added, "all hope isn't lost for Michael Cohen — I'm sure the FBI will keep this whole thing quiet for $130,000."
The Week
Escape your echo chamber. Get the facts behind the news, plus analysis from multiple perspectives.
Sign up for The Week's Free Newsletters
From our morning news briefing to a weekly Good News Newsletter, get the best of The Week delivered directly to your inbox.
From our morning news briefing to a weekly Good News Newsletter, get the best of The Week delivered directly to your inbox.
"Meanwhile, the chaos continues at the White House," Colbert said, starting with the apparent "imminent firing" of Chief of Staff John Kelly. Trump took to Twitter over the weekend to accuse The Washington Post of lying about a verbal brawl he reportedly had with Kelly, saying the Post's reporting is "like a poorly written novel." Colbert agreed: "Just look at the lurid, unbelievable fantasy novel the Post has been reporting for the last year and a half: Reality TV host becomes president with the help of an evil cabal of Facebook and Russians while he's sued by the porn star he had sex with? It's all in John Le Carré's classic novel, Tinkle, Traitor, Stormy, Spy." Watch below. Peter Weber
-
Fannie Flagg’s 6 favorite books that sparked her imaginationFeature The author recommends works by Johanna Spyri, John Steinbeck, and more
-
Google: A monopoly past its prime?Feature Google’s antitrust case ends with a slap on the wrist as courts struggle to keep up with the tech industry’s rapid changes
-
Patrick Hemingway: The Hemingway son who tended to his father’s legacyFeature He was comfortable in the shadow of his famous father, Ernest Hemingway
-
Florida erases rainbow crosswalk at Pulse nightclubSpeed Read The colorful crosswalk was outside the former LGBTQ nightclub where 49 people were killed in a 2016 shooting
-
Trump says Smithsonian too focused on slavery's illsSpeed Read The president would prefer the museum to highlight 'success,' 'brightness' and 'the future'
-
Trump to host Kennedy Honors for Kiss, StalloneSpeed Read Actor Sylvester Stallone and the glam-rock band Kiss were among those named as this year's inductees
-
White House seeks to bend Smithsonian to Trump's viewSpeed Read The Smithsonian Institution's 21 museums are under review to ensure their content aligns with the president's interpretation of American history
-
Charlamagne Tha God irks Trump with Epstein talkSpeed Read The radio host said the Jeffrey Epstein scandal could help 'traditional conservatives' take back the Republican Party
-
CBS cancels Colbert's 'Late Show'Speed Read 'The Late Show with Stephen Colbert' is ending next year
-
A long weekend in ZürichThe Week Recommends The vibrant Swiss city is far more than just a banking hub
-
Shakespeare not an absent spouse, study proposesspeed read A letter fragment suggests that the Shakespeares lived together all along, says scholar Matthew Steggle
