Speed Reads

Late Night Tackles Trump and impeachment

Jimmy Kimmel and Seth Meyers recap Trump's 'deranged' rally rants on dishwashers, Dingells, and toilets

"Christmas is coming, whether we're ready for it or not," Jimmy Kimmel said on Thursday's Kimmel Live. "Last night in Washington, Nancy Pelosi roasted the president's chestnuts pretty good. Democrats in the House made Donald Trump only the third president ever to be impeached." No Republican voted for impeachment, he said, "which means they either really love Donald Trump or really hate Mike Pence."

"Trump was in Battle Creek, Michigan, when the vote happened, pepping himself up with a rally," Kimmel said, giving a taste of "what our president was talking about while this historic impeachment vote was coming in." For example: "'Women tell me' about the dishwasher. What women are telling him about the dishwasher? Trump also lashed out viciously at Rep. Debbie Dingell from Michigan," joking that her late husband, Rep. John Dingell (D-Mich), "went to hell because his wife voted for impeachment."

"Republicans have insisted that Trump is weathering the storm and pushing forward," but Wednesday night's "deranged rally" suggests otherwise, said Late Night's Seth Meyers. "The rally was billed as a Merry Christmas rally, and in the spirit of the season, Trump went through a list of grievance and insults" that included "security guards, Democrats, the media, and dishwashers," he said. 'Normally when someone rambles that long, you have to take away their keys."

"Let's assess Donald Trump's understanding of dishwashers," Meyers said. "I mean, he clearly has no idea how they work," and "he has clearly never washed a dish in his life. Also, I like how he says 'women tell me.' They probably tell you that to get away from you."

"But probably my favorite moment came right before that dishwasher rant, when Trump was again rambling about light bulbs, garbage dumps, sinks, and showers, for some reason — and even his own fawning admirers were just staring at him in silence," Meyers said. "When you're Donald Trump and you lose Trump supporters, you know you're way out in left field." The crowd did get involved "when Trump went on yet another rant about how people supposedly have to flush toilets 10 times now," he said, and he flagged Trump's pronoun choices: "I love how when it's impeachment, he's like, 'We're all getting impeached,' but when it's about toilets, he's like 'You people probably take giant 10-flushers, not me.'" Watch below. Peter Weber