Stephen Colbert and Samantha Bee advise GOP senators to save themselves, subpoena Trump's secrets


"It's Day 2 of Donald Trump's Senate impeachment trial," Stephen Colbert said on Wednesday's Late Show, and "once again, the lead manager of the case today was Adam Schiff. It was gratifying to see someone taking the constitutional responsibility of their office seriously. He laid out the case against the president clearly, passionately, cogently, and, I believe, courageously. Because whether or not President Trump is removed from office, history will not forgive those who look the other way at his abuses or forget those who stepped into the breach at this moment of crisis." He looked at Wednesday's top trending topics on Twitter, sighing: "We're doomed."
"Schiff stood there today in front of his audience, discussing the president's corruption and incompetence using graphics, audio and video of witnesses, even clips of Trump incriminating himself," Colbert said. "Hey Schiff, you're treading on my turf! If I find out you've got a house band, I'm suing."
Senate Republicans, meanwhile, blocked every Democratic request to subpoena new witnesses and documents, Colbert noted, and he had some advice: "Aren't you the least bit curious about all the crazy s--t Trump did? You don't even have to do anything about it, just vote to find out what it was! Everybody wants to find out their boss' secrets. Take it from me, you don't want to learn it from a Ronan Farrow article."
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"One non-witness' non-testimony will be especially fascinating to not hear," Samantha Bee said on Full Frontal: Lev Parnas. She ran through some of his recent evidentiary dump, and one document in particular: "If it were any more of a smoking gun, Don Jr. would be holding it over a dead elephant."
But Bee also explained why "Republicans are setting themselves up for trouble by not hearing the evidence" against Trump now. "Every time Trump proclaims his innocence, another piece of evidence pops up to poke a hole in his story," she said. "Look, guys, we know you're going to acquit Trump, but do you really think that will be the end? You think there won't be any more accomplices who snitch on Trump to protect themselves? Or any more journalists who dig up proof of his guilt? Even if Trump is re-elected, this Ukraine story will haunt him until the blessed day when he's forcibly plunged out of the White House." There's some borderline NSFW language. Watch below. Peter Weber
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Peter has worked as a news and culture writer and editor at The Week since the site's launch in 2008. He covers politics, world affairs, religion and cultural currents. His journalism career began as a copy editor at a financial newswire and has included editorial positions at The New York Times Magazine, Facts on File, and Oregon State University.
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