The Democratic presidential candidates are debating in South Carolina on Tuesday night, and "if the last debate is any indication, ladies and gentlemen, this thing is going to be a donnybrook," Stephen Colbert said on Monday's Late Show. "The reigning queen of pain" is Sen. Elizabeth Warren (D-Mass.), who "some pundits were ready to bury" after poor showings in Iowa and New Hampshire. "But after her performance in the Nevada debate, Warren's back on the map thanks to her hammering of former New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg," he said.
After Warren challenged Bloomberg the nondisclosure agreements his company had women sign, Bloomberg said they mostly didn't like his "jokes." Yes, Colbert deadpanned, "every comedian knows you have to get nondisclosure agreements when people are hearing your jokes." He pointed viewers to his own NDA, which is very short. And Warren wasn't done burying Bloomberg. "Wow," he said after playing one jab. "Warren is just following in the words of Michelle Obama: When they go low, we also go low, because that's where Mike Bloomberg is."
"Bernie Sanders won big in Nevada on Saturday and is now considered to be the frontrunner — that's right, there's a 78-year-old man running in front," Jimmy Kimmel joked on Kimmel Live. "Boy, the debate on Wednesday was a disaster for Mike Bloomberg," he added. "It was a real Vegas magic show. Elizabeth Warren sawed Bloomberg's campaign in half in Las Vegas. Everyone piled on him." Bloomberg, meanwhile, is dumping money into the race, Kimmel said. "He even hired the Houston Astros to go around stealing the other candidates' signs."
The Week
Escape your echo chamber. Get the facts behind the news, plus analysis from multiple perspectives.
Sign up for The Week's Free Newsletters
From our morning news briefing to a weekly Good News Newsletter, get the best of The Week delivered directly to your inbox.
From our morning news briefing to a weekly Good News Newsletter, get the best of The Week delivered directly to your inbox.
"There are still a lot of undecided voters," Kimmel said, and "instead of waiting for the nomination, I think the candidates should pick their running mates now, to make it easier for us." He had suggestions, and some of them are pretty good.
"After the Nevada caucus, the Democratic nomination picture is becoming clearer," Trevor Noah said at The Daily Show. "Warren and [Sen. Amy] Klobuchar need a miracle to get back in the race, [Joe] Biden and [Pete] Buttigieg are fighting desperately to be the moderate alternative, and as it stands, Bernie seems to be on a clear path to winning the most delegates. And I can tell you now, when he wins them, he ain't sharing s--t. 'It's not us, it's me!'" Watch below. Peter Weber
-
Florida erases rainbow crosswalk at Pulse nightclubSpeed Read The colorful crosswalk was outside the former LGBTQ nightclub where 49 people were killed in a 2016 shooting
-
Trump says Smithsonian too focused on slavery's illsSpeed Read The president would prefer the museum to highlight 'success,' 'brightness' and 'the future'
-
Trump to host Kennedy Honors for Kiss, StalloneSpeed Read Actor Sylvester Stallone and the glam-rock band Kiss were among those named as this year's inductees
-
White House seeks to bend Smithsonian to Trump's viewSpeed Read The Smithsonian Institution's 21 museums are under review to ensure their content aligns with the president's interpretation of American history
-
Charlamagne Tha God irks Trump with Epstein talkSpeed Read The radio host said the Jeffrey Epstein scandal could help 'traditional conservatives' take back the Republican Party
-
CBS cancels Colbert's 'Late Show'Speed Read 'The Late Show with Stephen Colbert' is ending next year
-
A long weekend in ZürichThe Week Recommends The vibrant Swiss city is far more than just a banking hub
-
Shakespeare not an absent spouse, study proposesspeed read A letter fragment suggests that the Shakespeares lived together all along, says scholar Matthew Steggle
