This is terrible
May 20, 2014
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David Wise, who was convicted of drugging and raping his wife for three years and filmed several of the incidents, won't serve any jail time, a Marion Superior Court judge has ruled.

Wise's ex-wife, Mandy Boardman, told the Indianapolis Metropolitan Police Department that she'd found the videos on Wise's phone and had woken up with a half-dissolved pill in her mouth. She says Wise also put sleeping pills in her drinks and assaulted her while she was unconscious.

The Los Angeles Times reports that Wise emailed Boardman confessing to his actions, saying he was "taking advantage of [her] in [her] sleep." Wise was convicted of six felony charges and prosecutors asked for Wise to serve 40 years, but he won't spend another day in prison. Before the trial, Wise spent 24 days in jail, and he is now sentenced to eight years of "home confinement."

Boardman says that during the trial, Marion Superior County Judge Kurt Eisgruber told her she needed to "forgive" her husband. "To have my rapist, my attacker, convicted on all six counts, only to be let go — only for him to walk out that door the same time I could — was just unfathomable," Boardman told the Times. "I never thought that he would be at home, being able to have the same rights and privileges as I do." Meghan DeMaria

FIFA
1:19 p.m. ET

As expected, FIFA president Sepp Blatter cruised to reelection today, despite allegations that he presided over a culture of corruption that reached the top levels of soccer's global governing organization. Buoyed by support from African, Asian, and South American countries, Blatter beat his challenger Prince Ali bin al-Hussein of Jordan 133 nations to 73 (three ballots were invalid). The vote was held only miles from the Swiss hotel where many of his lieutenants were arrested on corruption charges Wednesday.

"I will accept this responsibility and I want to fix FIFA together with you," Blatter, 79, told the voting body Friday just before he was elected to his fifth term. "I want to do it now and tomorrow and the day after and the weeks and months to come so that at the end of my term of office, I will be able to hand over a solid FIFA, a FIFA that will have emerged from the storm." Julie Kliegman

Only in America
11:53 a.m. ET
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A U.S. Marine is appealing a court-martial for refusing to remove a Bible verse from her desk. Monifa Sterling posted the Old Testament passage "No weapon formed against me shall prosper," which her supervisors deemed to be "contrary to good order and discipline" because the workplace must remain free of "divisive or contentious issues," such as politics and religion. The Week Staff

Cuba Libre
11:29 a.m. ET
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The U.S. formally removed Cuba from the list of states that sponsor terrorism Friday, according to a State Department news release.

The White House first announced this move last month. In a December 2014 step toward normalizing diplomatic relations with Cuba after 50 years, President Barack Obama ordered the department to review the nation's inclusion on the list.

"While the United States has significant concerns and disagreements with a wide range of Cuba’s policies and actions, these fall outside the criteria relevant to the rescission of a State Sponsor of Terrorism designation," department spokesman Jeff Rathke said in the release. Julie Kliegman

won't someone think of the children?
11:14 a.m. ET
Scott Olson/Getty Images

In the summer of 2014, former President Bill Clinton accepted a lifetime achievement award from the Happy Hearts Fund, a charity that builds schools in regions affected by natural disasters. But as the The New York Times reports, the former executive director of Happy Hearts alleges Clinton only agreed to attend the Happy Hearts event after Happy Hearts offered to make a $500,000 donation to the Clinton Foundation:

"The Clinton Foundation had rejected the Happy Hearts Fund invitation more than once, until there was a thinly veiled solicitation and then the offer of an honorarium,” said the former executive director, Sue Veres Royal... "Petra [the founder of Happy Hearts] called me and said we have to include an honorarium for [Clinton] — that they don't look at these things unless money is offered, and it has to be $500,000."

That $500,000 could have funded the construction of 10 preschools by Happy Hearts in Indonesia. A representative of the Clinton Foundation denied fund solicitation and said the $500,000 would be spent on currently undetermined projects in Haiti. Bonnie Kristian

Wow
11:01 a.m. ET

Yesterday, a Quinnipiac University released new presidential poll results, which found that Sen. Rand Paul (R-Ky.) currently holds sixth place in the Republican field — but, along with Marco Rubio, performs best against Hillary Clinton in a general election match.

But when that same poll popped up on Fox News, something was missing:

(Rare)

If you guessed that what's missing is Rand Paul and his 7 percent support, you've guessed correctly. This is the second time this month Paul has been absent from a Fox poll report.

For supports of both Rand and his father, Ron Paul, this is nothing new. During the 2008 election cycle, Fox excluded then-Rep. Ron Paul from a presidential debate, even though he polled higher and raised more money than candidates who were invited. And in 2011, Jon Stewart dedicated a segment to discussing how Fox and other channels deliberately ignored Ron Paul's near-tie for the Iowa Straw Poll victory. Bonnie Kristian

Let laid-off dogs lie
10:58 a.m. ET
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As many as 60 drug-sniffing dogs in Oregon are about to be out of a job thanks to legislation that has legalized recreational marijuana use starting July 1. Members of the police's K-9 unit have been trained, at the cost of $10,000 each, to smell for four odors: methamphetamine, heroin, cocaine, and marijuana. While 3 of those drugs will remain illegal, soon the ability to identify marijuana will become a liability. The dogs are trained sniff out marijuana and not budge until they are rewarded — a skill that will no longer be needed. And since pot is often around drugs that will remain illegal, cops and prosecutors will no longer be able to prove that the dog smelled an illegal drug, rather than a legal drug, that led to the arrest or search warrant.

While many of these dogs will be in early retirement, at least some will find new jobs. One dog, Dora, will be reassigned to a prison, one of the few places that marijuana will still be illegal. But that means being separated from her longtime human partner, Travis Dahl. "I'll stay away from her for a while. It would be too hard for her, and for me,” Dahl told The Guardian about their impending separation. Meanwhile, Dahl and the rest of the police force will replace their dogs with 'three-scent' dogs that were never trained to sniff for pot. Marshall Bright

sing along song
10:53 a.m. ET

Mitt Romney had Meat Loaf's endorsement in 2012. And now, Ted Cruz has the support of Christian rap group We Are Watchmen for the 2016 GOP nomination. The group, which describes itself as "a movement that uses music and message to mobilize American Christians to civic duty," recently released "Set It on Fire," a conservative rap anthem that, true to its word, name-drops Ronald Reagan during its first verse.

"The banner is in the air for the conservative ascendancy," We Are Watchmen declare. "Collectivism, everyone's a victim like the reds do," the song continues, before dropping the money line: "And for our next president, we're all in for Ted Cruz." Listen to the track in full below. Samantha Rollins

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