Late night hosts joke about Elon Musk's Twitter stake, Trump's Truth Social flop, other social media riches
"The Biden administration today announced a new new round of sanctions designed to punish Russia for their war crimes against Ukraine," Jimmy Kimmel said on Wednesday's Kimmel Live. "I'm surprised they have any sanctions left. This one targets Russian banks and two of Vladimir Putin's adult children. Wouldn't it be something if what finally got Putin to stop this was his daughter going, 'Dad, they cut off my credit card! You gotta do something!'"
"Twitter announced a plan to test something they should have done like 10 years ago, which is adding an edit button," Kimmel said. "That way when you're Ted Cruz and you accidentally post stepmom porn, you can add the word 'Oops' to the end of it and you'll be fine."
Elon Musk pushed for the edit button right after buying a 9.2 percent stake in the company, and "sure, I mean I'd rather you canceled the accounts of all the Nazis, but an edit button would be nice," Stephen Colbert said on The Late Show. "Continuing with tonight's billionaire theme, there's news about Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg," who recently shared "an interesting anecdote about how beloved he is at work," he said. "'Yes, sure, they're comparing you to the Dark Lord Sauron 'lovingly.' 'The guys at the office adore me — they call me Evil Incarnate, El Diablo, Jarred from Subway...'"
Subscribe to The Week
Escape your echo chamber. Get the facts behind the news, plus analysis from multiple perspectives.
Sign up for The Week's Free Newsletters
From our morning news briefing to a weekly Good News Newsletter, get the best of The Week delivered directly to your inbox.
From our morning news briefing to a weekly Good News Newsletter, get the best of The Week delivered directly to your inbox.
The Late Show also suggested other Facebook nicknames for Zuckerberg.
Speaking of social media, "has anyone here been on former President Trump's social media app Truth Social?" Jimmy Fallon asked on The Tonight Show, answered with silence. "Well, that's the problem. Apparently Trump is upset, he's furious, because his Truth Social app is a flop." Yeah, "at this point, even Rudy Giuliani's OnlyFans account has more traffic," he joked. "Trump is furious because other than Trump Airlines, Trump Steak, Trump Vodka, Trump Mortgage, Trump Magazine, and Trump University, it is the first business fail of his career."
Meanwhile, "Ivanka Trump reportedly met yesterday with the House committee investigating the January attack on the Capitol for nearly eight hours," Seth Meyers said on Late Night. "Oh my God, you guys, she did it! She worked an eight-hour day!"
Create an account with the same email registered to your subscription to unlock access.
Sign up for Today's Best Articles in your inbox
A free daily email with the biggest news stories of the day – and the best features from TheWeek.com
Peter has worked as a news and culture writer and editor at The Week since the site's launch in 2008. He covers politics, world affairs, religion and cultural currents. His journalism career began as a copy editor at a financial newswire and has included editorial positions at The New York Times Magazine, Facts on File, and Oregon State University.
-
'Voters know Biden and Trump all too well'
Instant Opinion Opinion, comment and editorials of the day
By Harold Maass, The Week US Published
-
Is the Gaza war tearing U.S. campuses apart?
Today's Big Question Protests at Columbia University, other institutions, pit free speech against student safety
By Joel Mathis, The Week US Published
-
DOJ settles with Nassar victims for $138M
Speed Read The settlement includes 139 sexual abuse victims of the former USA Gymnastics doctor
By Justin Klawans, The Week US Published
-
Ukraine cheers House approval of military aid
Speed Read Following a lengthy struggle, the House has approved $95 billion in aid for Ukraine and Israel
By Peter Weber, The Week US Published
-
Poland, Germany nab alleged anti-Ukraine spies
Speed Read A man was arrested over a supposed Russian plot to kill Ukrainian President Zelenskyy
By Peter Weber, The Week US Published
-
Israel hits Iran with retaliatory airstrike
Speed Read The attack comes after Iran's drone and missile barrage last weekend
By Peter Weber, The Week US Published
-
Peter Murrell: Sturgeon's husband charged over SNP 'embezzlement' claims
Speed Read SNP expresses 'shock' as former chief executive rearrested in long-running investigation into claims of mishandled campaign funds
By Arion McNicoll, The Week UK Published
-
Mark Menzies: Tories investigate MP after 'bad people' cash claims
Speed Read Fylde MP will sit as an independent while party looks into allegations he misused campaign funds on medical expenses and blackmail pay-out
By Arion McNicoll, The Week UK Published
-
Why Johnson won't just pass Ukraine aid
Speed Read The House Speaker could have sent $60 billion in military aid to Ukraine — but it would have split his caucus
By Peter Weber, The Week US Published
-
Sudan on brink of collapse after a year of war
Speed Read 18 million people face famine as the country continues its bloody downward spiral
By Peter Weber, The Week US Published
-
Trump's first criminal trial starts with jury picks
Speed Read The former president faces charges related to hush money payments made to adult film star Stormy Daniels
By Peter Weber, The Week US Published