Want to grow 12 acres of weed for the government? Now you can.

In what is either an incredibly bureaucratic sting operation or a legit science experiment, the federal government says it is seeking proposals from those who can grow a whole bunch of marijuana. The open call for proposals, posted Tuesday by the National Institutes of Health, and first reported by Time, seeks someone who can "cultivate and harvest, process, analyze, store, and distribute cannabis (marijuana) for research."

In other words, the government wants someone to grow weed for science.

Perhaps you're not qualified to "periodically analyze cannabis extracts, and isolated cannabinoids for authenticity" — and no, they probably don't mean via inhalation. You could still be in luck. The NIH could still use help help growing pot in 1.5-, 6.5-, and 12-acre quantities, so long as you have a video monitoring system in place to thwart would-be thieves.

The Week

Escape your echo chamber. Get the facts behind the news, plus analysis from multiple perspectives.

SUBSCRIBE & SAVE

Sign up for The Week's Free Newsletters

Join more than 350,000 subscribers and keep yourself informed with a selection of The Week’s most interesting, enlightening and entertaining stories - plus daily puzzles.

Join more than 350,000 subscribers and keep yourself informed with a selection of The Week’s most interesting, enlightening and entertaining stories - plus daily puzzles.

Sign up

Someone get these guys on the phone. Washington could use their help. --Jon Terbush